"Within me, all of this love is refusing to go away."
__
It must be hard having a dual life. Kim is a famous singer publicly, then a mafia privately. As a Wik fan, Chay was happy seeing his idol's career growing. He is known by everyone. He was just a simple artist doing covers online. But as someone watching over Wik's private life, Chay can't help but pity him.
Chay is currently watching Kim as he sleeps soundly, snoring and talking in his sleep every now and then. He must be so tired he was asleep for almost a day. He was mumbling his mother's name during his sleep which made Chay smile. Kim is still dreaming of his Mom. He wonders what kind of kid Kim is.
In very odd instances, Kim whispers his name. He perked up in the sound of his name. He thought he was awake and calling for him; but after observing his deep breaths and light snoring, he could confirm that Kim was still in deep sleep. He giggled silently and felt his cheeks blush. Kim is dreaming of him now, huh? Why would that be?
Suddenly, a knock on the door startled Chay. He turned just as the door swung open. Big entered the room, his eyes on the folder in his hand. "Khun Kim–" he started but stopped when he saw Chay inside Kim's room. They both exchanged a wide-eyed look. They both peeked at their sleeping boss to check if they had disturbed his sleep. Thankfully, they didn't or else they are both dead.
They got out of his room silently. "What are you doing, P'Big? You can't just barge in like that. You know Khun Kim is resting." Chay said.
Big scoffed, "You are a big talker. What are you doing inside his room in the first place?" he asked. "You look like a creep watching him closely," he added.
Chay blushed, embarrassed by his actions. He tried to change the topic when he saw the folder again, "What's that?" he asked.
Big hid the folder behind his back. "None of your business," he answered in a serious tone. Chay frowned. He was intrigued by it. Well, he is intrigued by everything Kim and Big's business, but Kim kept saying to drop it off since it doesn't concern him. "I have a question." Big suddenly said, "How did your parents die?"
Chay was taken aback by Big's question. That was so random. Big never asked him personal questions because; first, it wasn't that important, and second, he didn't care. So the question surprised him. Chay's frown deepened and looked at Big suspiciously, "How did you know that my parents are dead? I never told you that, P'Big." he said.
It caught Big off guard. He thought of an excuse before Porchay's suspicions grew. "All Theerapanyakul personnel were background checked. So is your brother. Just answer the question, Porchay." he said.
Chay squinted his eyes at Big. He was very much aware of that. But, why now? He could have just asked when he started working for them. However, Chay mentally shrugged his shoulders. Maybe Big was just curious about it. "Car accident. They encountered a drunk driver the night of the accident. They tried to avoid it but lost control of the wheel. They bumped into a huge tree." he said. "Well, that's what my Hia told me. I don't remember anything since I was still a baby."
"Did the drunk driver ever get arrested?" Big asked.
Chay shrugged, "I don't know. I never asked." he said innocently. Big can see honesty in Porchay's eyes. "Why are you asking, though, P'Big?" he questioned.
Big shook his head, "Nothing. Just curious." he replied. "You should go. The Beast won't like it if he's left starving," he said.
Chay perked up, "Oh right." he said and left. He left Big clutching the folder in his hand.
—
It looks like his any other dream. Everything is very much the same. Is he truly awake now? Or is he still sleeping and dreaming? Kim doesn't know. His dream is always the same to the point he already memorized it. He lay motionless in his bed, staring at the ceiling. He still felt so tired. His whole body ached. His head is pounding. He can't distinguish dreams from reality anymore. He was so exhausted he could barely think.
Like in any other dream of his, his throat is dry and coarse from too much singing. Slowly, he got up from his bed. The heat from the sun blazing from his window felt too real. Has he really woken up yet? It seems like his mind is still asleep, so he go on with it. He went to the kitchen at a slow pace.
He can hear random sounds from the kitchen. He moved closer and peeked inside. There he was–the young man who is always in his dream–Porchay, cooking as he watched something on his phone. Kim is pretty sure he is dreaming. It was always like this. He would silently stare at Porchay, wondering why is he in his dreams. Until he got used to it. He would listen to him sing and hum his songs.
Then, he casually walked in like he usually does in his dreams. Kim can feel it again, the warm feeling in his chest every time he sees Porchay. The more he moved closer to him, the stronger his craving was. His craving to touch him; to hold him; to be so close to him. Thank the stars he is dreaming, or else he will set his feelings aside again.
Porchay turned and jumped as he was startled by Kim's presence, "Khun Kim, you scared me there for a second." he said and smiled at him after. "Glad you are awake. Are you hungry? I cooked something."
However, Kim didn't seem to be listening. He expected Porchay to say those words. Everything is very much familiar to him. That's why he had a good feeling he was still sleeping. Kim knows he needs to wake up now. But before that, he needed to do something first. Something he always do in his dream.
Porchay was blubbering something that Kim didn't seem to hear. Kim moved closer to him to the point he can feel the warmth of Porchay's skin against his. The warmth felt so real that Kim almost thought that he was awake; that he was not sleeping and currently living in reality. Porchay startled once more as he felt Kim's hands on his waist. He was so close it was making his heart race. Kim caged him against the kitchen counter. "K-Khun Kim? Are y-you okay?" he asked.
"I... I c-can only do this w-when I am d-dreaming." Kim mumbled, his words slurry. It was like a routine to him now. "Fuck. I wish you were real..." he whispered once more and cupped Porchay's face. Kim didn't hold back anymore. Their lips suddenly meet in a warm kiss. He felt Porchay stilled from the sudden affection. Kim closed his eyes, waiting and waiting.
The dream was supposed to end here. It had to end when their lips collided. Kim should be awake by now. What the hell is happening? Porchay's stiff body suddenly relaxed and gripped Kim's tank top. He pulled him close, deepening the kiss.
Kim opened his eyes, surprised by the reality slowly sinking into his mind. He pulled himself away from Porchay, staring at him wide-eyed. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Kim, what have you done? Porchay stared at him fondly with his beautiful doe eyes, cheeks tinged in red. "Y-You..." Kim started.
"I am real. You are not dreaming." Porchay mumbled, his heart still racing and pounding against his chest. "It wasn't the first kiss I was expecting, though," he added, blushing more.
Kim blinked a few more times, reality hitting him hard. He fucked up. He fucked up so bad. He let his emotions slip through him. In his defense, he thought he was dreaming. He stared at Porchay for a little while. He doesn't seem to be mad at what Kim has done. Kim's whole being was washed over with embarrassment. How is he supposed to deal with this now? He slowly detached himself from Porchay. The young man had a confused look on his face. "I-I... I-I'm sorry..." he said and quickly left the kitchen, leaving poor Porchay dumbfounded.
-
yes, i can hear y'all screaming...
- migy :)
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KIMCHAY TALES: BITTERSWEET EXCHANGE
FanfictionStarring Kimhan Theerapanyakul and Porchay Kittisawat. #kimchayau