My Big Brothers (age regression)

Thoughts <3

Meadows POV

It's been a month since my aunt has passed away. Which I'm surprisingly doing ok with grief. My aunt and I were not close. She took care of me and loved me but she was a very busy person. Always gone, I was alone almost 24/7 living with her. But I understood and I stilled loved her. Especially since she gave me somewhere to live.

My parents died when I was 10 in a car accident. I loved them so much. I think about them all the time, and I miss them. But I know they will always be with me in my heart. I still have my stuffie that dad got me. It's a grey elephant holding a stuffie pink flower, its name is Monty. And I also have the locket my mom got me for my 9th birthday. It's a picture of all three of us when I was 3-4 years old.

Sadly I have not found a caregiver, I have meet quite a few but I have never connected. My aunt was also a Pet owner but never got one because she also felt she never had a connection after her last one left her. Thankfully I have my amazing friend Shelly. She's so kind. We meet at an anime comic com! I became close friends and went on vacay's to her house multiple times a year since she was a two hour drive away. They were kind enough to take me in after my aunt passed of an unknown disease.

Shelly and Martha have been so kind. They've listened to me when I felt overstimulated and upset. Even helped when I got sick for two weeks with a horrible flu. Martha even put me into dance classes with Shelly just last week. I've always loved to dance! I am also in ballet. I love ballet. My mom put me in class at a very young age and it never left me, it calms my mind. I always think of my parents when I dance. It helps me cope and I just hope they're proud of how far I've come.

I am doing my best not to be upset or let this bring me down. I refuse. Yes it's hard. Even though my aunt was barely around I still loved her. She tried her best and I know she cared. It was just hard for her with her sister dying after her pet left her. It changed us all.

"Meadow..?" A small voice echoed through my ears.

I look from the bowl of cereal that I was eating to see both Shelly and Martha looking at me with concern written on both of their faces.

"Are you alright honey?" Martha asks

I giggle "ah sorry I got so lost in my thoughts!" I smile as I start to eat again. Shelly giggles as she eats her cinnamon toast crunch. Martha only shakes her head as she sips her coffee while reading off her phone.

"Hey girls don't forget to clean your room before we leave to go shopping. We're going to be out all day and I don't want to come home to a dirty room." Martha speaks

"Yes ma'am"

"Okie mommy!"

Both Shelly and I share a room. Martha has a big house with multiple rooms, but Shelly insisted that we shared because she wanted to be close with me. Plus there are times where she slept with her mommy anyway. I was fine with it, I loved being close to her.

After we clean our room and then of course, sitting in the car in the McDonald's drive through because a little someone wanted nuggets. How could I blame her though?

I saw a family of two littles and two caregivers. I felt jealous. I always wanted a family. But I would be thankful just to have at least a caregiver. People have asked why Martha and Shelly haven't asked me to be part of their dynamic but both sides don't want it. I mean I truly believe Shelly is my sister. She says the same. But I am just not interested in that and neither are they. But we're ok with that. They are looking for someone but they are looking for a more of a masculine little, which I think is cute. Shelly really wants a big brother. To be honest it would be nice to have a big brother

I've heard they can be protective over siblings especially little sisters or just mean but still it sounds nice.

Oh also Shelly and Martha are sexual in their relationship and I have no interest of ever having sex to be honest. I did once and it was fine but yucky. I found out I was asexual...I mean who wants that all the time?! And kissing! Ewwwwwww

Shelly and Martha do it a lot and I gag. Ew.
Even though they are in a sexual relationship, they are looking for asexual male little. Or whoever they connect with of course. Either way I'm truly happy for both of them. To be happy and have whatever every little and caregiver wants..safety.

Later we're shopping and I see another family. Two girls and two guys. One of the girls is jumping up and down excited to show the stuffie she found. One of the guys told her she could have it as long as she used an inside voice. I want that. I need that. Hopefully one day.

"Hey mommy may I get this?" Shelly holds up a pink lollipop so Martha could see

"Yes love!" She pauses before she turns to me
"Do you want one to honey? You can get one if you want!" She says with a big smile

"Oh, thank you!" I felt myself slip. Both Shelly and I jump up and down all excited. We continue to babble back and forth about random things until auntie Martha stops us

"Oh hey Shelly did you ask her?"

"Ask me what?" I asked confused looking at Martha and then to Shelly

"Oh! I forgot!! So meamea! My friends invited me over to a play date and I asked if I could bring my friend. They said yes! So would you like to come?!" Shelly asks jumping up and down

"Really? That actually sounds fun I would like to go pease" I said nervous but excited because I feel like I need to get out more

"Aww that's great love, I'll let Scarlett know!" Martha says before pulling out her phone to text someone while we choose out some more dnacks for the next two weeks

Scarlett what a pretty name. I wonder who she is in the dynamic.

After a long day we were finally back home. It was bedtime and Martha helps us both to our cribs. She was kind enough to pull out Shelly's old crib for me. Especially since I become younger than Shelly a lot. After she read a bedtime story she kissed our foreheads and said goodnight.

I could already hear Shelly snoring. I giggle to myself. She sounds like she's dying

I lay there wondering what it would be like to be part of a family again. To be loved. I know Shelly and Martha love me as family but I want to be in a family.

But I'm just glad I'm here. I'm just happy to be alive at this point...

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hi lovely's!! Hope you're enjoying the new book! So excited to write this!! Let me know what you think!🩷🩷