Sincerely yours I Severus Snape - A Harry Potter Fanfiction

Stupid little crush

"What a fucking idiot!" Mary howled in the Slytherin's Girls' Dormitory, weeping her eyes out to Clary. Clary, who had just finished her homework and laid down on her bed, had jumped up when Mary stumbled in the room and began crying. She was now sitting next to Mary and rubbing her back, trying her best to soothe the dark-haired Slytherin.

"It could happen to any of us. Think about me. I went through your drawers, cupboard, and everything just to find out what your relationship with Prince was", Clary admitted, her cheeks slightly blushing as she revealed her behaviour during the last autumn. "Speaking of, how are things with Prince? Have you told him anything about this?" Clary asked, completely unaware of the fact that in fact Prince and Severus Snape were the same person.

Mary took a deep breath and closed her eyes, attempting to make her body calm enough to being able to speak.

"We haven't talked in some time", she said, staring at her hands which were shaking on her lap.

"What?" Clary, who was genuinely confused, leaned closer towards Mary, and laid her hand on top of Mary's. "Why? What happened?"

"Nothing", Mary said, her tone signalling Clary that it was time to drop the subject. Clary blinked her blue-grey eyes and sighed. She didn't believe Mary, she knew something had happened, but she also didn't want to upset Mary more than what she already was.

"Okay", she said and squeezed Mary's hand. The two of them sat quietly in the Girls' Dormitory for a while, before Clary gained enough courage to ask the question that had been lingering in the back of her mind ever since Mary had told her what had happened with Professor Snape.

"Um, Mary", Clary started, trying to find Mary's eyes so that she would know if it was wise to continue. Mary turned her red and puffy eyes to Clary and tried to wipe the tears away. Seeing Mary like that made Clary rethink her decision to ask the question from Mary. Part of her thought that it was too soon, but another part was too curious. And she also knew that Mary's answer would give her a better insight into the relationship between her best friend and the schools Potions Master.

"Yeah?" Mary said and tried to smile, which gave Clary enough encouragement to continue.

"Have you... Are you going to continue your private lessons with Professor Snape?" Clary asked. The question didn't come out of nowhere to Mary, she had been suspecting that the blonde Slytherins was about to ask a question of such kind from her.

"Honestly", Mary started and sighed deeply, trying to come up with an answer. After thinking for a couple of minutes, she finally spoke again.

"I don't know", she admitted. Clary nodded in understanding and gave Mary a comforting smile. When it came to being around someone you have feelings for, and knowing that they don't feel the same, Clary was an expert.

"Do what feels best for you", she said, her voice carrying a soothing influence. Mary nodded and bit her lip. There were two forces battling in her mind, trying to convince Mary to either stop the sessions and see Severus never again, or continue seeing the Potions Master in the Friday evenings and pursue her dream of becoming a successful Potions Master herself. If she continues the lessons, it means that she would have to stand being around the only man she had ever had true feelings for, knowing they could never have a relationship apart from being a teacher and a student. But on the other hand, did she really want to give up on her dream just because of some stupid little crush? No, she didn't.

"I'll continue them", Mary said after being silent for a good while. Clary, who had wandered into her own thoughts, snapped out of them, and focused her gaze back on Mary. Their eyes met, a determination gleaming in Mary's dark green eyes.

"If that is what you truly want", Clary said, a shadow of worry lingering in the corner of her eyes. "But I must warn you, it won't be easy."

Mary nodded, understanding that Clary's warning came from a place of love and first-hand experience.

"I know", Mary said and took Clary's hand. To ease the tension of the situation, a playful smirk spread on Mary's lips.

"But hey, they do say that karma is a bitch", she giggled and laid her back on her bed. Clary stared at Mary in disbelief for a while before bursting out in laughter. She laid down next to Mary and turned her pale face towards Mary's.

"Yeah, I suppose you're right."

****

Next Monday, from the moment Mary woke up, she could feel a heavy rock hanging in her chest. She knew there was only one way to get rid of that rock. She also knew that the thing she needed to do in order to make that rock disappear, was the last thing she wanted to do.

"Are you sure you're alright? I wouldn't blame you if you wanted to skip this lesson", said Clary as the two Slytherins were making their way down the stairs leading to the dungeons. They had just survived History of Magic and Professor Binns' everlasting nonsense and were now heading to the dungeons for a double lesson of Potions.

"I'm fine. I'll just avoid him the best I can", Mary replied and jumped down the last three steps. Clary followed her with an elegant leap and voiced Mary that she understood.

It appeared to be that Severus had shared Mary's idea of minimalizing the contact between the two of them during the lesson. Or so it seemed, until the lesson was over, and the students started to exit the classroom. When Mary threw the bag on her back and turned towards Clary, who was preparing to leave as well, Severus broke the silence between him and Mary.

"Miss Montgomery, if you would be so kind and stay just for a little while. I have something I need to discuss with you", he said in the most neutral tone he could. The words made Mary's heart sink. Her eyes met with Clary's, who motioned Mary to ignore Severus and follow her out of the classroom.

"It's fine, Clary. You can go", Mary assured, spreading her lips into a wide fake smile. She was most certainly not fine, but she wasn't going to tell that to Clary. She didn't want her worrying about her.

Clary quickly glanced at Severus before returning her gaze back to Mary and asking her if she was sure.

"I'm sure", Mary said and nodded towards the door. Clary, who didn't seem to believe Mary, narrowed her eyes before finally turning around and leaving Mary alone with Severus.

"Does she know?" Severus asked after Clary had closed the door, taking two hesitant steps towards Mary. Mary sighed, trying to regain her courage. This was her nightmare.

"Yes, she does", Mary said, still staring at the door and avoiding Severus' gaze. Severus, who was standing next to Mary, nodded in acknowledgement and turned his eyes to Mary.

"I'm sorry I asked you to stay but I had to ask you this", Severus started, clearly finding the situation as uncomfortable as Mary found it. "Do you want to continue our sessions?"

Mary pursed her lips and wiped a strand of hair off her face, playing time to think for a good answer. She knew she wanted to continue the sessions, but she needed a bullet proof explanation in case Severus wanted to end them.

"Yes, I do", Mary started, took a deep breath, and turned around to face the man standing next to her. "I want to become a Potions Master, and you happen to be the best Potions Master I have ever met. I would very much appreciate if you could continue the sessions. I promise I will remain utterly professional during those lessons, so you don't have to worry about it."

Severus was staring at Mary, an uninterpretable look in his black eyes.

"Well, that's good. I'll see you on Friday evening then, the usual time", he answered. Mary, who wanted to get out of the room as quickly as possible, only nodded and grabbed her backpack.

"Is that all for today?" she asked, already walking halfway through the room.

"Yes, that's all", Severus' words came out slowly as he stared at Mary making her way out of the classroom. "Goodbye, Mary", he said and leaned his back on his desk.

"Goodbye, Severus."