Trust ~ Jean Kirschtein x Reader/OC

CHAPTER NINETEEN ~ Head or Heart

I feel my body jolt into action without command. I jump off the branch and immediately begin to fly after Ymir's titan at a speed and with skill I did not even think I could have. I dive in, through, and over branches and gaps in trees without thinking about the possible consequences, leaving almost everyone behind.

"She's pulling away!" I announce with a crack in my voice to everyone else behind me, not even turning around to look at them.

I keep moving quickly after Ymir, terrified yet not even thinking about anything going on. Eventually, I can see the end of the small forest, which opens out into a clearing with a few trees scattered here and there. When I get close enough, a bright flash that indicates a titan transformation blinds me, and I quickly dart behind the tree closest to the opening, tucking myself behind its trunk as a wave of hot wind billows through the trees and the ground shakes. I cling to the bark of the tree, trying not to be thrown off the branch as it trembles with the ground.

When the shaking dies down, I peer hastily around the branch of the tree, now seeing Reiner in his armoured titan form again, Ymir attached to his shoulder. I angrily stamp my foot down on the ground, holding my swords so hard my hands tremble, I've let them get away again! Now this time, they've got two of my friends!

A sudden zip of ODM wires come up beside me as someone lands on the branch beside me. I retain my angered look with pursed lips and furrowed eyebrows as I look at the person, clearly too pissed off to change it. Of course, when I turn my head, it's Jean who stands there, looking down at me with some teasing smirk.

I roll my eyes and face forward, anticipating our horses to come under us any second.

"You're cute when you're mad," Jean mutters beside me.

I snap my head and look frustratedly into his eyes, "what?!"

"Uh, nothing," he stutters.

"Okay, no," I interrupt, "you can't just say 'nothing' like that every time! And besides, if I did hear you correctly now really is not the time to be saying that. Also, why on earth would you say something like that?!"

He scratches the back of his head uncomfortably, "well I-"
"We'll follow them on horseback!" An older scout appears, interrupting Jean.

"You're lucky," I seethe at him, watching our horses file through in groups below us.

I drop off the branch and fall all the way to the ground, catching myself at the last moment, just as Status begins to run up to me. He slows as he reaches me, and I use his rein to vault myself over and onto his back, adjusting my feet into the stirrups while giving him a small pat on the neck.

"Alright, ready to go Status?" I ask him. He snorts in response, and I indicate to him to speed up once more. We fall into line with the other Scouts, and the only sounds that I can hear is both Status and I panting ever so slightly and my heartbeat in my ears. Gen and Jacob ride together to the right of me, silently exchanging worried glances between one another.

"We've got to get Eren back!" The scout from before orders us.

I sink into my thoughts very quickly. I don't know how to feel or act anymore, everything within the span of three days has gone so, so wrong. I feel like I've been ripped apart limb from limb, large chunks of my trust being stolen by the actions of those around me. First it was Annie, killing Petra who became a parental figure to me for so many years. Then it was both Reiner and Bertholdt at the exact same time, being the two people that caused the death of my entire biological family, and taking Ymir. Then Ymir supposedly has eaten Historia after I was so determined to get her back. Not to mention the little things in between. Meeting Corina who looked exactly like Simone did; and having Armin, Zariya, and Jean all know about the stupid scars on my leg. As well as my huge outburst up on the wall when Bertholdt and Reiner transformed. My head feels like a complete mess, I don't know how much more I can take before I fully break.