TRIPLE THREAT: THE INEVITABLE

18. OVER THINKING

ROBYN

"You don't know nothing! Who have you lost? Your mother? That's nothing, Robyn. I've lost both of my parents, the only girl that I've ever loved and now Tony. Now try telling me you 'know'."

King's words continue to replay in my head over and over. The way he shoved me away from the door keeps replaying.

I'm not sure how or if I'm going to forgive him for shoving the way he did. I know he's grieving and like every one else, we're all out for revenge on who killed Tony. I get that he's angry and hurt. I know he's going lash out unintentionally. I was like that.

I want King to know that I understand what he's going through and that he can talk to me. He doesn't have to lash out like that, it's only going to cause him trouble. I should know that.

But what he did was still pure disrespect. I was so caught of guard that I almost cried. I'm a little disappointed in him, of course. I want to be there for him, I want to show him that I'm here and that I will always have his back. I want to be the girl that King wants so bad that I'm not sure how I feel about his actions.

Does that make me vulnerable? Desperate?

I definitely don't want a repeat of the whole Chaz situation. That will break me even more. I would finally give up on love or whatever it means.

I drive down Viagra Avenue and can't help but worry about where King is, how he's holding up, who's he with, is his leg hurting, how did he manage to drive?

I'm trying to hate him so much for the way he was acting earlier but I can't. I'm not sure if I'm that in love with him or am I just a doormat to him. I'm not sure about a lot of things with King. Our relationship is so undefined that it drives me crazy sometimes.

One minute he wants to be around me every second of the day and the other minute, he's blowing me off. I don't know if he realizes what he's doing or not. I do know he's still struggling with the death of his ex-girlfriend, Miya. Because of that, I will not rush him or force him to take things too far.

But at the same time, I don't want to be used more than I already have been. I don't want to be left in the dust.

The car behind me honks their horn loudly along with the other cars. What the hell are they honking their horns for? People and their road rages.

"The light has been green for two minutes now! Are you gonna go or not, bitch?" The rude driver pokes his head out and yells over to me.

I look up to see the light is green. Damn, where is my mind? I speed down the street. I can almost hear all the angry driver's sigh in relief and annoyance.

I try clearing my head but my mind keeps wandering off to King. He's going to be the death of me, literally.

I park my car on the corner of Diana's street since her driveway is full. I drag my self out of the vehicle and walk up to her and Tony's beautiful spacious home. My heart really aches for her and her unborn child. I press my perfectly manicured finger tip on the doorbell. As soon as Diana's older sister, Serena opens the glass door, my stomach knots up. I feel like vomiting when I step inside house.

There's a pile of broken dishes on the floor next to the tall china. A girl is sweeping the broken pieces with a broom. The tension in the air is very thick you can slice it with a knife.

"Why is she still living in this house? Isn't it a crime scene?" I ask Serena.

"She's going to stay with me for a while. She's just getting a few things.. well, trying. There's a police up there to make sure none of the evidence is removed or planted."