Perfect

Down bad

Jin observed as the startled omega ran away after he threw a glass in her direction, causing it to shatter on the floor. Instantly, regret washed over him, with anger slowly subsiding. He couldn't understand why that omega had come there in the first place.

He hoisted himself up from the bed, feeling foolish in front of her. How could she possibly assist him? He made his way to the restroom, relieved himself, and then sat on the floor, disgusted with himself and still seething with anger.

Time passed by, but Jin remained lost in his thoughts. He kept replaying his actions in his mind, wondering why he couldn't control himself. Why couldn't he just remain indifferent?

Dusk began to settle outside the bathroom window, yet Jin made no attempt to move. He stayed there for as long as he could, his body trembling due to cold. Because of his weight, Seokjin always felt cold, even in the summer, and during winter, he struggled to keep himself warm. He knew that if he stayed there any longer, his body would turn blue, but he remained unmoved.

Not until the sound of the bedroom door shuffles and an exhausted sigh reaches his ears does he realize Taehyung has come back home. Quickly, he attempts to fix his hair and wipe away any tears on his face before Taehyung catches sight of him in the bathroom looking pathetic.

When Taehyung does see him, his initial anger quickly softens as he observes Seokjin's condition. His heart tugs at him to prioritize warming up the omega first, even though the impending conversation is equally important.

"Why did you attack her, Seokjin?" Taehyung's first question is direct, not bothering to inquire about how Seokjin is feeling. "You don't even bother to ask how I am doing."

"If you're resorting to throwing things at someone who came to help, you must be doing terribly, right?" Taehyung responds sarcastically, his breath heavy. "I fail to comprehend why you acted this way, Seokjin. It was completely out of character for you, and now she'll spread the word."

Seokjin is provoked by his words, feeling like he's not entirely at fault except for handling the situation poorly. "Maybe you should have considered the consequences before sending your lover to take care of the omega you mated," he shouts with the last of his energy before breaking down on the bathroom floor.

"I do not love her, Seokjin, for heaven's sake. I am not in love with anyone. Since you entered the picture, I have not been intimate with anyone else. I would never have dared to come close to you after being with someone else. Why can't you understand this? I am tired of you behaving like an untamed animal," Taehyung growls at Jin, causing the omega to flinch. "You're lying," Jin stutters, "I saw you in the news the day after we -"

Taehyung interrupts, exasperated, "In the news? Are you even listening to yourself? This is why it is so difficult to love you because of all these irrational thoughts that consume your mind and make you act out. I am tired of your behavior. Why can't you just be normal, Seokjin? Why can't you make it easier for me to love you? I have been trying so hard, but it all goes to waste. Then you blame me for being scared, for following the boundaries you set when you are like this. Just have your meals. Stop being so insecure all the time. Can't you control yourself? Is it that difficult?" Taehyung kneels in front of Jin, hiding his face behind his palm. "Why? Please tell me, why are you like this?"

Jin falls into an eerie silence, and his heart sinks into his stomach. He had never seen Taehyung break down or cry like this before. Had he caused the alpha to become so weary of him?

They sat there in silence as Taehyung spoke, "Jin hyung, please believe me. There was a time when I liked her, yes, but when we got together, when you let me hold you in my arms, I couldn't think of anyone else but you. I fell in love with you, but I had to distance myself because your lifestyle scares me. Seeing you surrounded by cigarettes, smoke, and the stench of alcohol, making yourself sick by forcing yourself to vomit, it makes me feel ill. I need stability, so I tried to stop loving you. I tried so hard but ended up hurting you even more, causing you immense pain that has left you in an even worse state.

However, after we mated, I realized that despite my efforts to resist falling for you, I couldn't. I still love you. To me, you are perfect - your weight, your skin, your kind personality, everything about you. But you can't see that, and until you can accept yourself, I can't either," he hiccuped, wiping the tears from his face. "I want to make things right, which is why I've been putting in extra effort, asking you to move in to take full responsibility. But when you act like this, you leave me with no choice but to distance myself from you," he cried even harder.

Jin felt an excruciating pain in his heart, as if someone had stabbed him repeatedly. His vision grew hazy, and he struggled to take in a breath. The room seemed to close in on him, shadows stretching and warping as if they were alive. Taehyung’s sobs seemed distant, echoing in Jin's ears. Desperation clawed at Jin’s chest as he crawled towards the vanity, his hands trembling violently as he reached for a blade.

Just as he was about to harm himself, Taehyung intervened, grabbing Jin's wrist, "No," Taehyung cried, his voice cracking. He discarded the blade with a firm flick of his hand, sending it skittering across the bathroom floor. Taehyung begged Jin to breathe, his hands moving frantically, rubbing Jin's back in an attempt to calm him down. "Hyung, please, breathe, just breathe." he pleaded. Despite Taehyung's pleas, Jin remained unresponsive, his eyes glazed over and his breath shallow.

Jin's mind was consumed by one thought, an overwhelming urge to end his suffering. With no other option, Taehyung pinched Jin's nose, the sudden pressure a shock to Jin's system. Jin snapped out of his panic, gasping for air as his body reflexively sought oxygen.

Taehyung embraces Jin tightly, inhaling the omega's scent deeply. "I am so sorry for everything," he murmurs softly as he runs his fingers through Jin's hair. Despite Jin no longer being in the midst of a panic attack, he continues to tremble and struggle to comprehend his surroundings. Taehyung remains seated on the cold bathroom floor, holding Jin protectively in his arms. With stopping, he continues to breathe in Jin's scent, gently rocking him back and forth, "Please don't go, don't leave me alone," Taehyung repeats, his arms securely around Jin, who remains unresponsive except for letting out occasional sobs.

Time passes unnoticed by Taehyung. He estimated that it had been over two hours since they've been sitting in the cold bathroom room. His legs grow numb, but he remains by Jin's side until the omega finally falls asleep. After that, he carefully tucked Jin into bed and laid down beside him, Taehyung realizes he can not bear to lose Jin or leave him alone until he has fully recovered.