《 46. The Mess 》

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This song is from Janaki's perspective:

सोच लो मुझे, ढूँढ लो मुझे
थाम लो मुझे, रोक लो मुझे
सोच लो मुझे, ढूँढ लो मुझे
थाम लो मुझे, रोक लो मुझे

सोच लो मुझे...
थाम लो मुझे, रोक लो मुझे

"आओगे तुम कभी, "
मेरी जाँ कह रही
गाएगा ये समाँ,
गाएगी ये ज़मीं
बदलेगा ये जहाँ,
गाएगा आसमाँ
"आओगे तुम कभी, "
मेरी जाँ कह रही

(Think me
Find me
Hold me
Stop me
Think me
Hold me
Stop me
Think me
Hold me
Stop me

You will come someday
My life is saying
All will sing
Land will sing
Everything will change
The sky will sin
You will come someday
My life is saying)

Aaoge Tum Kabhi by The Local Train

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R A G H A V

It was not until the ringing of my office landline that I realised I was standing still, like a statue. Till then, I was staring at the unmoving floor where she was standing a few moments ago. It was as if my words were being yelled back at me, they were being taunted at me now, as a payback. As my karma, it was all coming back to me, my own harsh and cruel words piercing my chest like a hot and racing bullet. Shaking my head, I slowly and forcibly moved my body towards the ringing telephone and clicked on the speaker button on it. "Speak" I said in a mute tone betraying the storm and anger raging inside of me.

"Sir, Subhadra from the reception speaking, Janaki Ma'am has left a credit card, a debit card and her car keys with me and she asked me to give it to you. She left around ten minutes ago." she said like a trained robot.

"Okay." I cut the call and shut my eyes, as the storm had now turned into a full fledged war. 

I had a sinking feeling in my stomach, my chest was hurting and my heart was thudding but most of all I was tired, I was tired with myself and my stupid attempts to destroy all the good things that happen to me. 

But this was not the time to wallow in self pity, instead it was time to find her, my wife, who was upset with me. I took my phone from the desk and realised I had four texts from Janaki, my heart soared to life. All my clouds, scattering to make way for my sun. As soon I unlocked my phone and clicked on the notifications, my smile vanished and my stomach sinked more upon reading her texts.

J : I wanted to help and support you but you forced me not to. You helped me ...You let me go. I let you go.

J : In the movie, Laila Majnu, Laila forcibly pushes Qais away, while going he says, I quote, "Ja ab nahi aata ab tu hi doondh mujhe."

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