scoring you

Chapter 35

Alyssa

"Tell me what he did to you Alyssa," he says softly once I enter his bedroom.

It's big, huge, a massive double bed with pristine furnishing, trophies are collected all over his room with pictures of sporting teams decorating his walls.

"Alyssa?"

"I don't want to be a burden."

He steps closer to me, "I told you already- I'm not leaving."

I close my eyes at his stubbornness, we have that in common.

"W- when I broke my arm- you remember that," I add which he nods to, "he came into my ward and said the strangest things- mostly about my appearance but some other things as well." Aiden's grip tightens, I don't even think he realises, "he says these very little things that make me curl up in a ball and re-think everything. I can't trust people Aiden, especially after Tyler," I shudder. "H- he made me go on this diet and I had to continue it at collage-"

"You don't have to," Aiden says trying to be calm.

"I do- did. His words make me believe him Aiden! He's my father!" I continue on from what I was talking about, my words laced with pain, "I forgot about the diet- and I was lazy. So when I got that fucking call I started pushing myself really hard- and Tess wasn't there to stop me so I was just completely alone." My soaking wet hair drips on his floor.

"Your not alone- not anymore, not ever, okay?" He says.

I assess him and see no faults, only him.

"I don't know that,' I wheeze looking up at his toned face.

"Well I know," he says, "I know because I'm here."

"You won't be here forever."

He grins, he grins so brilliantly that it lights up the whole room and the darkness surrounding it, threatening to bite wounds. "I've waited a decade for you Alyssa, unknowingly or not I'll wait for you forever."

There it is again- my mouth goes purely dry and I'm unable to form a word.

If those words came out of anyone else's mouths I wouldn't of believed them- I would of laughed hysterically covering the sadness I would feel. But this boy in front of me makes me want to believe everything- I do believe him because I trust him.

And I hate myself for it.

If he'll never leave it will still end terribly- I can't be trusted and I'll break both of out hearts in the process. I bring destruction everywhere I go- I hurt people and there's nothing I can do about it. I'm like a tractor bulldozing everything in it's path, knocking down and smashing anything in it's way.

I'm a bulldozer.

I'm selfish.

One day it will be the death of me, figuratively or not.

I stare at every beautiful drop of rain on his face, in his eyebrows, long lashes, and all the water dripping down the rest of him.

"Your dumb," I say.

"Why?" He asks curiously.

"For liking me," barely a whisper escapes my mouth.

"I'd say it's the smartest decision I've ever made," he tucks my hair behind my ear, a habit of his, he always does it whenever he gets a chance.

"Your full of surprises Peters," I smile back at him.

"Uh-huh," he says, "the greatest surprise of all was falling for you."