The Happiness Adds On.

The Happiness Adds On - Part 19

"I don't understand why he kissed you?"

I came to spend the evening with Nav after work today. I haven't seen Nav since her wedding and we had a lot to discuss, including my major self battling conflict and the disturbing event that happened today.

 We talked about how much we missed each other, her wedding, my mom, the funeral, my sudden disappearance and of course, Vikram.

 After a good two long hours, I gathered all my courage and told Nav about Jas. I told her about our night at her wedding and meeting him at lunch today. 

"Nav, how would I know? I'm so confused and lost and nervous and terrified. I mean what if Vikram finds out? I've been battling myself with the thought of whether Vikram is the right choice for me or not. What if I still have feelings for Jas or what if he's the better choice? I've been struggling with myself every day to stay and believe and trust. I'm just frightened with my life and everything that came in my package." I've been in panic mood for the last few hours.

"Hey, hey! Relax babe! Take a moment to breathe at least."

 I nodded my head and took a deep breathe in.

 "Okay now. One thing at a time! You think you still have feelings for Jas?""I don't know Nav. When I first saw him at your wedding, I felt this rage and disgust towards him. Any conversation or anything that occurred afterwards happened when I was drunk. Today, there was a part of me that wanted to apply all my confidence and strength in knowing the answer of this question. I mentally debated with myself whether or not I should kiss him, hug him, or give him another chance. But then, I thought about Vikram. Just the thought of him weakened me. I couldn't do this to him. He means so much to me. I really do love him and I'm sure of it. The three months that I was alone, I wanted so badly to run back to him. When he found me, I wanted nothing more than to stay in his arms forever. I love him with all my heart and then Jas came and I thought I had myself put together for once but I didn't." I felt something wet drop on the palm of my hand. It was a fallen tear. I didn't realize I was crying. 

"How did you feel when Jas kissed you?" Nav consoled me by rubbing my back lightly.

 "I wanted to push him away from me. His lips were rough and dominating. They immediately formed a sharp painful unease in my stomach and I wanted to clean my lips to get his touch away but, I just force. No matter how much I tried and wanted too, I couldn't move and I couldn't push him away."

"Samaira, your heart and mind were just confused in the moment. You love Vikram. Jas is long gone from your heart. And he definitely should be after everything that he's done to you."

Nav's words formed a warming smile on my face. Vikram was seriously one of the best thing's in my life. There was just anything that I was confused about. 

"There's one thing that I don't understand Nav."

 "And what might that be?" 

I stood up from her couch and moved towards the open window to look out in the beautiful moonlight.

"Everytime we meet, it seems like Jas doesn't remember anything that's happened. He meets me like we're nothing but newly met acquaintances. He didn't bring up anything from our past." 

Nav followed me towards the window.

"He's just a jerk. Don't let any of that stuff get to you. He's probably hoping you forgot about him so he can take a second go. Like you said, he was making sexual jokes and implying kissing beforehand."

"That's true. I still need to talk to him about this. I mean he is Vikram's cousin after all. I don't want any friction between them because of me. And what if Vikram finds out? I gave him so much crap about being with me and not leaving me and everything. What if he leaves after this?"

"Samaira calm down. Vikram will never do anything like that. He loves you. I think you should sit him down and talk to him before he finds out from somewhere else. He'll understand if you tell him. And it's not like you kissed Jas."

"I know. I'll have to find the right time to tell him. Thank you for your help Nav. I really missed you. Especially after mumma, I really needed some girl time with you."

 "Okay! Enough with our problems and senti situations! I might have a little surprise for you."

 "Ooooo! Tell me please."

 "Come with me. I'll show you." 

 She grabbed my hand and lead me up the stairs towards the second floor. Jeet and Nav had moved into a small yet cute two storey house after they got married. It was a welcoming home, much to Nav's choice. She pulled me into an almost empty room that was painted yellow. 

 "This is the surprise. Go ahead and explore the room."

 "Alright." I said with a very confused voice.

 The room contained of a few boxes sitting in the middle of the room. I sat on the floor beside the boxes and began to look through them.The first box had a bunch of old photo's of Nav and Jeet. I pulled out a few of Nav's pictures. I recall some of the one's that supposed to be hung on her walls back when we were both little kids.

 The second box was just a little shoe box that was covered in pink wrapping paper. "Nav this is your baby box."Nav's mom had created a baby box for her as a baby. The box had one of Nav's baby bibs, an outfit and a pari of small shoes. Nav always kept the box in her room. She was an only child which made her love herself for than anything else in the world. She always wanted to keep a piece of her childhood with herself.

 "I remember the way you and aunty would fight regarding this box. I'm glad she finally gave it to you. How did you convince her?"

 She smiled and let out a little giggle.

 "Well, you know how she always said that she'll give me the box when I have my own kids." With that her smile got bigger and she pointed towards the third box.

 The third box was open and had two big shopping bags in it. Understanding a little of what Nav was saying, I instantly reached for the bags and found the bags full of baby toys, room decor, empty baby albums and receipt for a baby crib. 

 "OH MY GOD! ARE YOU SERIOUS? I'm gonna be a masi."

 I run back towards her and pulled her into a big hug. Nav had always dreamed of having her own kids. She loved children. When she was ready to marry Jeet, they discussed kids instead of planning their wedding. I was gonna be a masi.

 "Why didn't you tell me before? I've been here for hours."

 "I wanted for you to relief your stress before I told you. Your reaction was so worth it."

 I reach down to put my hand on her belly.

 "Details?" 

 "I'm 3 and a half months pregnant. Due in the end of September! I'm so excited and Jeet already started on the room as you can see." 

 "Let's go downstairs. I'll make us some coffee while we talk about this."  

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Hey guys. Sorry about the long wait. This is just a short update for now. I'll have two updates out by Thursday and hopefully more next week. Sorry for not being consistent with my work. Thank you for all the love and support. Continue to vote, comment, follow and spread the word to your friends and followers.