When you love me

What really matters?

It's the next day and I find Ryan in the kitchen. He's making breakfast and stares at me when I enter. The moment is charged with tension, and I wonder if the kiss was just a dream. He gives a slight smile, something that looks like a nod of confirmation, but then leaves the kitchen, leaving me confused. Yeah, it was just a dream. Ryan wouldn't kiss me like that, he wouldn't even come into my room in the middle of the night. I must be crazy to think he kissed me.

As I prepare to go out to take photos, Cole appears in the doorway. He is excited, full of energy.

— Hey, Jennie! Are you up for a walk? — He asks, with a wide smile from ear to ear.

Before I can respond, I see Ryan walk down the hall. He stops for a second, his eyes lock on me and Cole, and then he turns away, quickly leaving.

— Of course, let's go. I was going to take photos... — I answer Cole, trying to ignore the strange feeling in my chest.

As we walk, Cole looks at me.

— What does Ryan do at your house? — He asks.

I explain, trying to keep my voice neutral.

— Lauren is staying there. My mother insisted that they stay with us while she... gets stronger. It's hard for Ryan to deal with this alone... It's just the two of them.

Cole nods, understanding.

— That explains why he's so busy. It must be hard for him now without Hailey.

— Yes, it's a very delicate moment for him, and for Lauren.

We walked in silence to the beach. The sea breeze is so refreshing that I could spend a whole day enjoying it without getting tired.

— Want to have some ice cream? — he suggests, pointing to a nearby ice cream shop.

- Could it be. — I respond with a smile, without thinking much about the suggestion, because my mind is on last night, wondering if the kiss was real.

We entered the ice cream shop and sat at one of the tables near the window. We place our orders and wait. Cole starts talking about trivial things, making me laugh and forget my problems.

— Jennie, I need to tell you something. — he warns.

— Tell me something? What it was?

— Promise you won't freak out?

— Why would I freak out?

— It's about Ryan.

— What about him?

— It's Sarah...

— Ryan's ex-girlfriend. What does she have?

— She's in town. I found out last night from the guys that she had arrived.

— And... why would I freak out? I have nothing to do with Ryan.

—But you feel something for him.

— Whether I feel it or not is not relevant. And even if I do, how can I compete with Sarah?

— Why do you think you couldn't compete with her? He doesn't even know her. — Cole says, sounding irritated.

— They've known each other for a long time from what I know, and she studies in Europe! How could I compete with that?

— Do not think like that. Sarah left him when he needed her most. While you seem to be always there...

— Are you trying to play me for Ryan or bring me down? Make up your mind.

Cole looks at me seriously, as if he wants to say something very important.