Drowning With You

CH. 23 💋

LOUIE'S POV

Somehow, I've ended up cuddled next to Winter, whose warm body now envelopes me. I've never been in her dorm until today, where she invited me to watch a movie.

We started out on different sides of her bed, but she'd shifted over a bit, then I did the same, maybe just for closeness or some sort of physical touch, though I wasn't going to ask and ruin what was happening.

I went with the flow, and it worked in my favor.

Now we are on our third movie and I have loved every single second of it, especially when our bodies are touching.

I'm not sure what is happening, just that I am going to let it play out. I like how it is, right at this moment. She's intoxicating, her smooth skin, her recent curiosity about my body. I love being around her when she I vulnerable and unguarded.

The credits play on the screen, and I wonder if I'll have to move out of her lap now. I don't want to, but I won't beg to stay. That's too far.

Instead, she turns on 'Love, Rose' and we stay where we are. She places the remote beside her and calmly runs her fingers through my hair.

Lying in bed together, it feels so domestic and normal, it shouldn't be like this. I shouldn't like this.

Hearing her heartbeat and her breathing below me is only making things more complicated than it already is. We're so close. Thump thump. Thump thump. Thump thump.

"Are you mad at your mom? For leaving you here?" I ask her, missing her voice and genuinely wondering.

"No. I'm not," she whispers, shaking her head against the pillow behind her. "She works so hard. She's done everything for me. I'm not mad, I'm just sad that I can't see her this week."

It's hard to understand a good maternal relationship; one where she feels as if her mother is there for her.

I feel a bit out of place, no longer able to relate, knowing I need something else to say.

"She seems nice." Is all I come up with; Winter nods and breathes out a little laugh.

"She's great. One of a kind, I guess." The way she speaks of her mom, I feel jealous but also relieved she has someone. I'm glad she has a person who loves her like she loves them.

I shift so that my chin is on her chest and I can look up at her face.

"Do you have someone? Like—someone who just is there for you?" she asks, then pauses, "oh well you have—"

"Matt," I finish her sentence. "Yeah. I met him in freshman year, he's my best friend."

She nods, "I see you guys sometimes. Talking to people, studying, playing card games in the lounge... You look happy."

"I am happy. Really," I reply, knowing that my life now is much better than when I was home with my parents.

The past couple months have been great and maybe that's due to the woman beside me right now, although I could never admit such a thing.

I don't want to think too much into this, I just want to do what I want. Which is why I drop a kiss on her chest, over her shirt.

"What was that for?" Winter asks me, smiling and blushing. It's so cute.

"Because it makes me happy..." I say, hesitantly letting my fingers fall to her thighs, caressing her body over her thin pajamas.

She lets out a soft shudder, grasping my arms to hold on to anything she can. I love seeing her when she's not fully in control. When she is just living.