the lost daughter of ghost

the fire within

Dear Tommy,

                             I can't believe it's been three months already i miss you a lot,mum and dad are arguing a lot at the moment  I don't know why though dad keeps saying their another man.Tommy am scared why won't you come home please come home i i miss you.I know you said you wouldn't come back but please don't leave me here i feel like a toy that's being thrown around in a game please Tommy.Just come home i beg.I don't know how long i have until i snap and run away again ,i know you said its not my fault but mum makes it out to be my fault.I understand if your still mad at me but don't ignore me.

 love your little sis  

I sat at my desk trying to drown my parents screaming out with my music.Since Tommy went to his new school nothing has been the same and i don't know why.I don't understand anything i just hope they stop or at least make up.I spun around to look at mr rat and molly the rat.I got closer to there cage as i tuck them out i started to cry i couldn't stop it.

''i wish they would stop why can't they stop shouting''i cried as i fell to the ground, hiding in the corner the one place that felt safe was this corner it was wear i often felt the felling of being watch come from this corner. ''i want Tommy back''i whimpered as i cried more as i held my pet rats close.I must had fallen asleep or something because i woke up and shouting had stopped and it was now 1:20.

My legs were shaky as i stud up i grabbed my door handle for balance i looked down to see Molly and Mr rat following me so i had to take them with me .We all carefully went down the stairs i could hear dad crying in the front room. '' DAD!''i shouted as i saw him crying into a broken picture frame he looked at me his eyes were red from crying but instead of whipping his tears and smiling he looked angry as he lunged at me.

''YOU IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT WE SHOULD NEVER HAD GOTTEN YOU''he screamed as he pinned me up against the wall i looked away in fear but i soon felt his hand slap my face.I felt num after that all i could hear was dad screaming in pain as Mr rat bite him hard making him bled.

  I grabbed them both before running back to my room locking the door.I grabbed a bag from my wardrobe and packed a few clothes and all the pills I needed. i also made sure to make space for my picture book my real mother made me oh and room for my teddy and for Mr rat and molly's stuff as i wasn't leaving them behind.i wasn't going to leave that night i would wait a little bit till my 11 birthday in a few week as i would be a phone hopefully, so i could use that to get around i don't know i just need to find my real family before i run out of energy before i gave up.

''BANG'' what was that i thought i quickly pocked my head out my door to see dad had left the house,i smiled a little as now i was kinda safe i guess i looked over at the letter i made for Tommy i walked over to it adding on to the end.

I am coming to you i don't care what you say  Tommy i can't stay here and i want to find my real family. Remember when i was 7 and you were 10 we made a pack you would help me find them one day that day is now Tommy the fire within me had arose and its fighting but it can't last long .

That was the last thing i wrote on this letter before quickly putting my rats back in their cage and running down to  the post box to send the letter. Hoping it wasn't too late to post it.After posting it was went back home and locked myself in my room for the rest of the day.It was cold in the house and what was ones full of music and joy was turned to anger and disgust no one smiled in the house mum wouldn't look at me anymore she wouldn't smile before she left for work and dad soon stopped making cute notes for me to find in the morning.It was just emptiness that's all it was now .

I soon looked at my clock and it read 4:50 time really flies by when your crying and reading at the same time however mum and dad still weren't home  yet it was nice not to hear yelling but it also felt odd i guess i had grown use to the loud screaming and fighting that was now my life.

I guess i should go get food soon i wasn't hungry, but i kew i need to eat something even if i was a bit of toast as long as i wasn't going to bed hungry it didn't matter what it was i was eating.Well as long as it was safe to eat of course. I walked down to the kitchen getting some crisp and chocolate and a drink  of water as we had ran out of juice yesterday.I carefully ran back to my room just before i heard the door slam open and shut.

''LILITH GET DOWN HERE NOW YOUNG LADY''oh god i thought well that's it am dead am not going to see Tommy again or ever find my real family.I tucked a deep breath as i walked into the living room seeing my dad stud in the middle of the room  his eyes still just as red as this morning.

''you're lucky you're  not 16 yet or i would have kicked you out''he looked at me with no signs of  emotions i looked at him i felt my heart break.  ''you are a lucky young lady ,that am allowing  you to live under my ruth  i could of sent you back to the orphanage you came from''i started to cry as he said this. 

''dad''i looked at him tears running down my face.

''AM NOT YOUR DAD AND I NEVER HAVE BEEN''i yelled as he pushed me to the floor ''go t your room''he demanded i quickly got scrambled onto my feet as i ran to my room crying even  more than this morning. Just a few more weeks till my birthday then I I  will leave for good.