the lost daughter of ghost

do you ever feel alone

Dear diary,

                        last time we spoke i was 11 am now a lot older and more alone then ever.Last week dad kicked me out the house after mum left him.I still don't understand why mum couldn't take me all she said was the place she was going would't let children enter.It hurt hearing my mum saying that she basically doesn't want me .However I been living  in a little hut on the border of the woods its kinda run down but am slowly fixing it oh and Molly the rat at babies last night am still unsure on who the dad is as my Rat has no balls.Oh and i lost contact with Tommy i don't remember why but i don't care he broke my promise and taking me away from the hell house he broke my trust now i have to work two jobs i know i know omg two jobs but i don't really get much money and i have to be careful what am buying and i don't even have time to look for wait i umm who am i looking for again?.

i had been forgetting a lot at the moment i wasn't sure why it could be due to running out of my medicine i was on that can't be a side affect can it.I flipped through my dairy seeing ripped out pages i don't remember ripping the page's out.It was like all  the important thing's in my life that i had wrote down in this dairy were ripped out by someone by why?

Ugh my head hurts.I looked around the old wooden hut that i now called my home the dust and shards of broken wood all pilled in the corner ready for me to move it looked like it was staring out me telling me to move it.I rolled my eyes not wanting to move it not yet anyways.I still needed to fix the broken window on the left side of the hut after it got broke i think the wind must of broke it.Though i wasn't sure as a few other things were broken as well.I went over to the broken window being careful not to stand on the broken glass that was nearly impossible to clean up.i went to look at how i could fix it well fix it the best i could due to not having much money and only limited resource i needed to be careful.I got closer every step i whimpered in pain as the small shards of glass stabbed my feet.

I got to the window my feet covered in small cuts as my shoes i was wearing had a few holes in them.Making the glass piers my feet a lot easier.

''bloody hell what am i going to do.''I cried as there was really nothing i could put here to even make a new window.I put my head in my hands as i cried feeling alone and scared. ''what am i going to do.''I thought to myself. I have nothing no one other than the rats. As i cried my head started to spin my stomach felt as if it was twisting around inside  i felt sick i knew what was happening but i didn't want it to happen not now not here i begged.

My world went black as i fell to the floor hitting my chin on the broken window.All i could see was flashing colors and voices.Why could i always see or hear people.

''Hey tommy want to come hand out with me and swiss tonight''the voice was soft and kinda quite i could't see them very well but the mention of Tommy made me upset so this is what he was doing so this is why he was to busy for me. I felt anger boil up inside me i was hurt at he just left me alone.But that name swiss w why was it familiar why though i know ghost has a ghoul called swiss so maybe that's why.  OMG.HOW FUCKING STUPID AM I.It hit me just as i started to wake up everything was kinda making scenes Tommy told me his school was a massive church but not for god but for the band ghost he never told me why and we got in a argument once when i tried to ask if i could meet them it tuck a week till we spoke again after that argument but it made scene why there were ghouls outside when we use to  pick him up for the holidays.I i know am slow clearly maybe this was a singe.I looked around whimpering in pain grabbing my phone shit i was late for work.I got up my legs shaky i grabbed  hold of the table in front of me trying to balance myself.I couldn't be late again i needed to get ready.I grabbed my jacket and rushed into the little shopping center in the village. My head still hurt but what hurt the most is how fucking stupid i was.

I looked around to see that all the shops were closed except my job as i worked at a 24 hour corner shop i did the night shift it was mostly empty when i arrived quickly jumping behind the counter.I was lucky that i had a few seconds to spear so i tuck a deep sigh of relief. I stud around doing nothing most the night i started to write notes down on my phone.

NOTES 

buy a ticket to visit Tommy 

listen to new ghost song 

find stuff out on my real dad

I diffidently was buying a stupid bus ticket to visit Tommy even if he didn't want to see me.I even started to look up Tommy's school to find nothing online.As i started to look into Tommy's school a women walked in she was kinda tall and had gray hair.I smiled as she came up to me.

''hello ma'ma how can i help''i smiled even though deep down i really couldn't be bothered smiling.The lady smiled back as she walked over to the counter she stopped as she stared at me it felt a bit odd but i couldn't be rude.She kinda looked shocked when you saw my face though as i hadn't been wearing an eye patch for a few days so i guess she could see my now very white eye.

''oh my your eye''i was a bit shocked when she said this ''the rumors are true''the women mumbled as she went through her bag.She pulled out a letter it had my name on it. ''You must be lilith please don't ask questions now but come to Darkmoor Academy next week''and with that she left leaving me confused and shocked. What was going on,how did she know me no matter how much it thought and tried to think of something I thought of that conversion with jack i had a while ago.God i wish i had asked a question back then or something.I guess i should go next week i don't know mabye i should text tommy ?

(its really bad am sooooo sorry i had bad writer block)