Blue Moon (gxg)

"I won't let you go." (38)

Bella and I stayed in each other's arms for as long as we stayed at The Blue Moon.
We kissed, we hugged, we stared at each other eyes, we watched the sun slowly go down.

"Ellie... remember when you asked me to turn off the chaos?" She said as she wrapped her arms around my back.
"How could I forget?" I smiled.

Her eyes softened: "Well... because everytime my world spins around you're the only one who knows how to slow it down."

My heart raced, every beat pounding louder than the last.
"I—" I stammered, not really knowing what to say.
"Oh my goodness... Bella." I whispered under my breath.

I hugged her to feel every fiber of her body against mine.

The sky became deep orange with pink clouds as the horizon turned purplish, casting a surreal glow over everything.
It was the most beautiful sunset I had ever seen.

The sky was slowly darkening more and more and I can sense that Bella and I thought the same thing, but neither of us dared to speak yet.

I sighed deeply: "I hate to say it..." I whispered softly against her chest, hoping she wouldn't hear me.
"Yes... I know." She replied reluctantly.

Bella said nothing more, but she understood.
She called Vincent to come and pick us up with the boat.

Why is so difficult to let go? I am not ready to let go of this place.
I am not ready to let go everything at all.

I could feel nervousness running through my body.

"Ellie..." Bella whispered to me.
Her eyes were sad as she extended her hand for me to get up.
I remained stubbornly sitting, shaking my head in despair: "Oh, God... I don't want to leave..." I muttered.

"I feel like I'm going to sink now..." I thought out loud.

Bella crouched down beside me: "I will not allow it. You don't have to face this alone." She said, her words a gentle plea.

She understood immediately but I can't bear to face her sadness.
It hurts me.

I stood up abruptly.
I turned around and grabbed the beach towel in a fit of rage.

"Stop for a moment, Ellie..." Bella's voice was gentle yet firmly.
I swallowed with difficulty: "I'm fine."

I was just getting defensive for no reason.

Bella sighed: slowly: "No, you are not... Can you just talk to me?" The rush impatient in her voice.
I stood there, arms folded tightly as I turned away from her eyes: "We are talking..."

I really don't it to happen... not in this way...

Bella sighed impatiently: "You know what I'm referring to, Ellie. We haven't talked about it yet..." Her voice trembled like it never did, but she kept her cool.

The air between us was heavy, every unsaid word lingered in the space.

I obviously know that she is referring about us... and what will happen once Joe and Leo will be back tomorrow.

And no, we haven't talked about it yet...

"... I'm not ready... I don't want to let go of this place and I don't want to let..."
My words faded as my voice became barely audible.

My eyes filled with tears.
My heart tremble, my world crumble.

"I don't want to let go either." Bella affirmed.
"But we have to..." I whispered almost pleadingly.