Never felt like this before - Leah Williamson

The aftermath

February 2022

Olivia's POV
After Leah told me everything, the only thing that was on my mind was to get out of that room. To get some air and process everything that was said inside. So I went outside, there was a terrace near the chill out zone, amd without caring that some teammates moticed my presence looking at me worried, I crossed the room and went to the terrace.

Tears were running down my cheeks, and quiet sobs were escaping my mouth. There were some couches, and I was laying on one of them, trying to control my breathing and emotions. After all, I'm still in camp, and I can't waste this opportunity to win my place in the Euro's squad.

The sun was almost gone, which meant that we would be having dinner soon. At the moment, I was at just looking at the sky and how it was turning into pink forming a beautiful sunset in such a grey day like today. I spent this last hour to think about Leah and what will happen next. Obviously I still love her and I know that that will never change, she's the one. However, knowing now what has happened these last few days, it hurts seeing her, knowing that she's just broke my trust. She lied, and would've lied longer if it wasn't for me being called up, because if not, she probably would've told me like a month later.

My thoughts were interrupted by Keira sitting next to me in the couch, not saying anything. Just keeping me company. Keira is one of the closest friend to Leah, they have known each other way before me and Leah. And even though I admit being jealous of her at first, we became really good friends. Their relationship has always been platonic, they both understantd each other so well, while with me well it was different, it was more than friendship as we have seen.

"You know, Leah told me the other day that she's never been this happier like she has been lately" She says.

"Keira, I know-" I start

"Wait Olivia, let me finish" she interrupts me "I'm aware of what has happened between you two, and I understand how you must be feeling. But you need to know that Leah would never, ever, hurt you. Was it stupid of her for not pushing Jordan off in the first place? yeah, but she did it anyways, she did not kiss back, and she told Jordan off. She told Jordan how in love with you she was" Keira tells me softly and I sigh, because this is so messed up.

"I-" but I cannot even talk before I start crying again, Keira just hugs me and lets me lean into her until I calm down. "I love her so much Keira, and she knows it, but I just cannot see her right now, because it hurts, it hurts that she's been 'busy' and that she felt the need to ignore me and lie to me. And I'm afraid of not being able to forgive her, because she's the right one" I manage to say while fidgeting with my fingers.

"Hey, look at me. You'll be okay, you will make your way back, because you need each other. And even if you don't see how, just remember all the reasons why you know Leah is your forever" Keira says softly. "I told her before to give you space, this time apart will help you both, and whenever you're ready she will be there, waiting for you"

"Thank you, for being for both of us and listening to me" I say with a small smile

"Of course, we're friends, you can tell me anything, even if it's about Le" She says making me laugh slightly.

-

A week had passed since camp and all the drama with Leah. It hasn't been easy lately, especially at Arsenal because we both are in the same group, but I don't want this argument to affect the team, so I tried as much as I can to put emotions aside and be civil, just talking to her when it was necessary.

Leah also has helped by giving the space as Keira told me back in camp, and I appreciate it. I knew that she would look for me and I could see in her face debating whether to approach me or not, and it made me feel so bad, because she doesn't know what to do, but neither do I.