Never felt like this before - Leah Williamson

Distant

A/N - sorry for not updating any sooner, just telling you that it is longer than usually this chapter. Just giving you a heads up. Anyways, enjoy!!❤️

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February 2022

Olivia's POV
Training couldn't have gone worse than it went, I kept losing the balls to the opposite team, and I was getting frustrated because this was all Leah's fault, my mind was only thinking on what has she possibly done to make her feel so bad to the point where she ignored me.

And so as soon as Sarina says training's done, I feel relieved but at the dame time, I couldn't take it any longer. I sprinted off the pitch as fast as possible heading inside to the changing rooms, I grab my things and immediately head to my room. Too much emotions were mixing up; on one side, I felt humiliated because of my disaster out there in training, this is my opportunity to get my place in the Euro's squad, but here I am, wasting it because I'm distracted, not a good first impression to the coach. And then, on the other side I also know that I am not ready to hear what Leah's gonna tell me, I am not ready for her to break my heart. Because I know she will.

On my way to my room, I was overthinking every moment that Leah and I shared during these past few weeks, which were only a few since she's been busy with training, going down to London and helping Jordan; as I got to my room I could feel my breathing starting to quicken, and my vision becoming blurry because of the tears forming in my eyes. When I pass my room card, tears were already falling down my cheeks, once I entered my room and closed it, I slid down to the floor, small sobs coming out of my mouth; letting everything out. In this moment, I just needed to be alone, to block all of this, at least until I feel ready for the storm outside. Because I have a feeling of what's coming, a feeling that I already know what Leah's done, and that's something that I cannot and not want to imagine or even think. Because what if I'm right? How could she? After all? I trusted her. I shake my head, in denial, not believing this feeling in my gut, but usually we're right whenever we have it, and I'm just here trying to reassure myself that this time it won't be true, because if it was... All I could say is how could she?

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Leah's POV
Training went... awful. My head was solely on Olivia, I was only thinking how to tell her what happened without breaking her heart, but there was none. But even though I was unfocused, Olivia was the most distracted, I watched her passes, and how imprecise she was being, she just kept losing the ball, not that I blame her or anything because I know it's my fault, I should've waited after training to approach her, but I just wanted her to know that I love her, and that everything will be fine, right?

Then, as Sarina said training was over, I immediately look over to Olivia, but she was nowhere to be seen, she wasn't on the pitch. Until I saw her running inside to the changing rooms. As I went to follow her, Beth stopped me, putting her arm in front of me.

"Leah, I don't think right now is the best time for you two to talk" Beth says softly

"But Beth she needs to know that it didn't mean anything, I wouldn't do that to her" I say, my voice cracking in the end making the tears that had been forming before, to finally fall. Beth quickly hugs me, while heading us inside without anyone noticing. We then enter a room, near the changing room, so that I can calm down before going back. But I just couldn't, I kept thinking about Olivia, and how much will this cost us. Beth kept trying to reassure me that we'll find a solution and that in the end, everything will be okay, that we're Leah and Olivia, the best of friends and each other's soulmates. However, right now, that wasn't helping me see or think that after we both talk about what I've done, we'll be alright, that we'll be able to move on. But I have hope, and hope is the last thing that you lose, isn't it?