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It hurts.

Today was a big day for our family, Alexia was attending a Nike event in London for the release of the new Phantoms including the limited edition AP11 range which they had been working on for the last couple of months and Jordi had his first ever football tournament at the Barcelona training ground. Ale was heartbroken that she wasn't able to come and watch our boy play, but she was being paid a lot of money to attend alongside the photoshoot she had done in her new boots and the new contact she had signed with Nike it was something that she couldn't skip.

It was an amazing event, and we both knew it wasnt something that she could skip. They were gathering all of their best footballers for the release party, from Barcelona alone there were four players going, Alexia, Aitana, Salma and Keira alongside other amazing players including Leah Williamson, Chloe Kelly, Sam Kerr and another player who neither of us wanted to be there.... Jenni Hermoso.

"I'll be on the first flight home tomorrow morning" Ale reassured me as we walked towards the front door in the early morning of Saturday.

"I know you will" I smiled.

"You've got nothing to worry about with Jenni, you know that right?"

"I do"

"I mean it, we haven't spoken in-"

"Ale, I trust you. I love you. This weekend it'll be six years since we got married, we've got two beautiful boys and if I remember rightly we've got an appointment next week to plan how we are going to get you pregnant. This whole Jenni thing is the last thing on my mind, believe me"

"I love you so much"

"I love you more..."

"I can't wait until this weekend, just me and you... no screaming kids, no chores... just us for what feels like the first time in years"

A large black car pulled up outside the house and ruined the moment.

"That's must be your car"

"Promise me that you'll send updates and pictures... and let me know how Jordi's football goes."

"I promise, now go or you'll miss your flight"

"I love you" she smiled, placing a quick kiss on my lips before walking down the drive and heading to the car that was waiting for her.

It had been about 4 years since the World Cup and everything that happened between Ale and Jenni and the almost two month long separation that happened after that and I'd never felt more secure in our relationship than I do now. Our family was thriving, Jordi starts pre-school in a few weeks, Enzo is the happiest little one year old and our marriage had truly never been better than it was now.

I felt no insecurities when it came to Jenni anymore.

Later that day the boys and I were settling into Jordi's football tournament, his team was playing in a mini tournament which meant that we had the whole day at the Barca training ground with local kids football teams playing against each other.

Jordi was familiar with the surroundings, obviously more so than any of the other children, so he was comfortable and confident as the first game started. Over the last few weeks he had slotted into playing as a midfield player just like his Mama and his never ending energy meant that he was all over the pitch. He scored a goal in their first match and was extremely chatty and excited in the break between games.

He had run off with his team for the next game when I noticed a group of very familiar faces standing on the viewing platform of the training ground. Mapi, Ona, Lucy and Irene were all watching from afar and my heart immediately swelled with appreciation.