Big Time Hangout

Part 27

"Just in case what?" I inquired.

He smiled, "In case you decide you want to change your mind..."

I laughed, "You are going to have to get over that. I'm not going to change my mind."

He got serious, "Still...It has to be said..." I waited and could tell he was having a hard time building up the courage, but he finally spit it out, "(yn) I love you..."

I interrupted, "I love you to Kendall."

He stopped me, "Let me finish this please."

My heart started to beat really fast, and I was almost in a panic wondering what he would say that will turn this sweet moment into an argument, but he continued, "I love you more than life itself. I can't and don't want to ever live without you. I'm hopelessly in love with you. I want you; I want David; I want whatever our future holds but whatever it is I want it with you." I was almost waiting on a marriage proposal, but it never came as he continued, "I can't and won't live without you. IF we ever split up then I don't know how I will go on but if I ever lose you completely my life is over."

I smiled at him with tears in my eyes, "Kendall I feel the same way but if something were to happen to me then you HAVE to go on. You have to help Logan raise my son to be the wonderful man that you are." He just looked at me, "Promise me Kendall. Promise me that no matter what you will make sure that he is just like you, Logan, Carlos and James when he gets older. I couldn't ask for better role models for him."

"But (yn) if you're gone..."

I said a little more forcefully than I meant to, "Promise me Kendall! Promise me right now."

He hung his head and whispered, "I promise you."

I raised his head, "Besides...it's never going to happen, so it won't matter anyway." I smiled. He wrapped his arms around me, "God I hope not..."

I pulled away from him slightly, "Where did this worrying Kendall come from? You never seemed to be that worried before."

He smiled slightly, "Oh no...he was there. You just never saw him. I didn't want to look crazy."

I kissed him gently on the cheek, "I wouldn't have thought you were crazy. Hell, you been driving me crazy lately with the wishy washy stuff. I had NO idea if you wanted me or didn't. I thought I was losing my mind...But I had to tell you the guys never let me in on anything. I asked them but not once did they open their mouths. Those are some pretty terrific friends you have there."

He took my hand in his, "That's what has made this so hard from the beginning. I just didn't want to hurt anyone. Those aren't my friends...they are my brothers. I would give the world for them."

He snapped his fingers, "Be right back." And disappeared out of the room.

I was sitting there wondering what he was doing when he walked back in with a smile on his face that would light up the sky.

Standing in the door he looked at me, holding his hands out, "Well?"

I laughed, "Well?"

He looked down and back at me. I glanced at his shirt which had a picture of me and him on it and couldn't help but laugh, "Where on earth did you get that?" I questioned.

He laughed, "I had it made after that first night. I hadn't worn it where anyone else could see it but it was always close by so I could look at us. I used the picture we did with Katie and cropped it where it was just you and me."

I started to laugh, "You are to much."

He eased toward the bed, taking my hand and pulling me to him, "No. I have been trying to tell you...I wanted it to be me so bad. I just didn't know how to deal with the guilt."