Lucid

Secrets|19

∞•DONTÉ•∞

Getting my hands dirty was never something I shied away from. It was an inherent skill I had to master from an early age. Earlier than I possibly should have. Those summers I knew nothing of a child's place.

The shower I had earlier did good to wash the grime off. The evidence had successfully been washed away but the weight of sin still rested heavily on my soul.

It was a thug of war with the reality of it all but I would not let it phase me.
I never did.

In the heat of things I had somehow forgotten about our meeting. Maybe it was for the best even if I'd been looking forward to seeing her again.
Such a huge fucking distraction for a woman I barely even knew.

The fact seh mi cyah get her out a mi head no help. It was comical.

She only reached out once after sending me the location and over eight hours later I realised I'd been blocked with a parting message.

It was nice but let's just give each other space and both walk away with grace. No explanations needed.

I chuckled, I don't know why the mention of space irked me so much.

And walk away with grace... She think a fucking pop the balloon this?

Granted I did stand her up so technically a my fault but still... Wasn't blocking me a bit excessive after our last convo? Wasn't she the one who wanted to talk? To meet?

I wasn't even sure what we were doing to begin with, no ground rules had been laid out yet. I just knew I still wanted more of her. No have a clue wah gwaan ina woman head more while but nah two push har still if a dat she want kool.

I'd gotten the chance to pour out my pent up frustrations, so I was no longer pissed. She was the least of my worries now.

The bigger picture was still very much present.

ᥫ᭡•NYASIA•ᥫ᭡

The wind was lazily blowing things to and fro but in large gusts. Why was it so windy anyways? Windy and hot to, I could feel the sweat rolling down my back. I was sitting on Mama's veranda trying to get some fresh air for what it was worth. The sun was setting but that made no difference with the heat.

Can you believe mi sit down over half hour ina restaurant a wait pon man? An fi wa?

Weh mi did wavy exactly? To talk about what we were doing and about our last encounter. An wa else weh couldn't talk over phone? I hadn't even thought that far I just wanted to see him.

Penis you did wah.
Girrrrl.

"Shut up!" I shouted.

"You good cuz?"

I bit my bottom lip closing my eyes. Why was I like this?

"Yes I'm fine Kyle. Just hot and torment."

I heard his footsteps as he approached then saw him sit in the chair through my peripheral vision. Him must think mi mad, all mi think a mi mad.

Mi mad?

"So who were you telling to shut up? A you alone out here."

Even though yuh right, please mind yuh business for once. I sighed, laying cross ways on the chair pressing my feet to his thighs.

"You gay now?" I asked him.

Hadn't seen him with any woman from him deh ya which was strange for him with his usual womanising tendencies.