Underage, A Dan Smith Love Story

Chapter Twenty Seven

Chapter Twenty Seven: Home

I was discharged from the hospital a week before I was supposed to, a week before the lads got off of tour, my tour. I had just changed into the clothes I came here in, when my dad entered the room.
"Daddy!" I exclaimed, running to hug him.
"You look amazing dear Arabella," he said.
"Can we go home?" I asked. My dad smiled, nodded, and then took me out to his car.

We got home and went straight to the living room to talk.
"You're sure you're better?" my dad asked.
"I'm sure. They have me on this drug, it makes me happy," I replied. My dad chuckled.
"I'm sorry I never came to visit," he apologized.
"It's fine dad. I didn't want anyone to see me anyways," I replied.
"And I'm sorry that I never noticed anything was wrong. I should've checked in on you more," he said.
"Dad, it's fine. If Dan didn't see it, no one would've seen it," I replied. He hugged me and then I took my suitcase and Nala's carrier up to my old bedroom. I started unpacking my clothes into my dresser when I heard a whinny from outside. I looked outside and saw my dad's ranch hand Augustus, trying to get one of the crazy horses from Italy to join up. I put on a pair of jeans, a white t-shirt, and my old work boots buried in my closet, then I ran downstairs.

I went out back to the pasture and watched Augustus run the crazy horse around the round pen. Once he realized I was standing there, he stopped what he was doing and released the horse into the pasture. He approached me.
"How are you?" he asked, seriously.
"I'm good," I replied.
"I thought you were going to leave for tour," he asked.
"That was before," I replied.
"Oh, that's right, I'm sorry," he apologized.
"It's fine," I assured him.
"You should go check on Arial," he suggested. I nodded and then made my way to the barn. I stepped one foot onto the barn floor and Arial poked her head out of the stall door. She whinnied very loudly and started kicking the door.
"Hi girl," I cooed. I grabbed her tack, got her out of the stall, and then put it on her. She stood very still as I got on, as soon as we got onto the horse trail, we were gone.

Having the wind fly through my hair as Arial galloped beneath me made me forget about every worry in my life. Once we got to the equestrian park, I pulled Arial to a stop so we could take a break. I dismounted and sat on the bench while she grazed. I pulled out my phone, which has been off for just over a month. My phone buzzed and buzzed and buzzed. They were mostly texts from my friends and the lads. The majority of the texts were from just after my first attempt, the others after I got hospitalized.

2 from Woody:
"Arabella are you okay? Dan just left the interview, seems to think you're trying to hurt yourself."
"I hope you're okay. I just heard."

1 from Will:
"Arabella you're really scaring Dan. He can't focus on the interview."

3 from Kyle while I was in the hospital the first time:
"Eh bby, let's go out tonight!"
"Chinese or pizza? Maybe we can get coffee after, though I hate coffee."
"What the hell happened?!?! Bella please pick up your phone!"

1 from Kyle while I was in the hospital the second time:
"I know you're still in the hospital. And I know I haven't visited you in awhile. I know you won't see this until you get out. But I love you too, and I'm sorry I didn't say it when you were being taken. I miss you so much and I love you so much. You're my sister, my best friend, and I'll love you unto forever. I can't wait until we get out so we can go out for coffee and pizza. What a great combo. Love you. Xx -Kyle."

1 from Jason:
"Don't talk to me, don't ever talk to me again. How dare you try to kill yourself? Everything is going for you Arabella! You have a life! You have friends! You're famous! Why the hell would you want to end your life. Your life is so precious. I guess I'll see you at Christmas or something. God, why do you have to be so selfish?!"

1 from Kat:
"I don't know what happened, and I don't want to know how you did it. I just want to know you're okay. I'm sorry for saying you weren't a good friend, you're the best. Stay strong, I miss you."

2 from Mark:
"I need you in the studio at like 2."
"It's fine, you had a good reason not to show up. I'm sorry, get better."

None from Dan.

I started to text them back.
To Kat:
"I'm fine, I'm okay. I miss you too."
To Jason:
"It's okay to be mad. I'm sorry."
To Mark:
"I'm better. Thanks for caring."
To Woody:
"I'm sorry for scaring you. I'm okay."
To Will:
"I'm sorry for screwing up the interview."
To Kyle:
"Pizza and coffee when you get back?"
To Dan:
"I hope you're having a nice time on tour."

They responded quickly.

From Kat:
"That's good. Maybe I'll see you soon."
From Jason:
"I'm sorry too, see you at Christmas."
From Mark:
"Good. Come to the studio sometime this week. We have to go over a bunch of stuff."
From Woody:
"It's fine, glad you're alright."
From Will:
"You didn't screw up anything. I'm sorry I was being an ass. I miss you, and hope you're doing well."
From Kyle:
"What a terrible combination."

From Dan:
"It's ok, I guess."

I laid on the bench for another hour when I decided that Kyle and I's plan for coffee sounded really good right now. I mounted Arial and rode her farther into town to the closet coffee shop. I tied Arial to the bike rack outside and then went in. I ordered a large coffee and then found a seat at a table. I pulled out my phone and checked my Twitter. I went back to tweets that Dan sent out as I was being hospitalized the first time.
"@arilouise had a little accident today. All tour dates are pushed back one week. Check her website for info." Another was posted after I was hospitalized the second time.
"It looks like @arilouise will not be joining the tour. It'll be changed to a Bastille tour. Check the website for info." Another was posted a few weeks into my stay.
"Please stop tweeting bad things about @arilouise she's going through a lot and doesn't need to see them."

My coffee was given to me by a young girl.
"I don't mean to pry, but you're Arabella Shea aren't you?" she asked.
"Yeah, I am," I replied.
"I was going to go see you your first night of tour. Then all the tour dates got pushed back one week and I couldn't go because I had to work. Then the entire tour was changed to be just Bastille, not you anymore. Why?" she asked.
"Just personal stuff. Went through a lot of things," I replied.
"It was because you lost that baby," she said, sitting down. I smiled at her and shifted uncomfortably.
"It was all just a lot of stress. I've never been in the spotlight before. It was so much to throw onto a normal person," I replied. She nodded.
"I totally understand. I mean, leaving my parents house and living on my own was overwhelming. I thought it'd be easy! Then I had to get a job to pay for university, and rent, it was all so much. I get it, I do. But I like this Arabella. You're so calm and chill. You're sitting, drinking coffee. You're out in public wearing jeans and a t-shirt. What celebrity can do that but you?" she asked. I chuckled.
"Thanks for the coffee and thanks for the chat. It was nice meeting you, but I have to go," I said. She nodded, we hugged, and then I left.

When I got home it was dark. I took Arial to her stall, took her tack off, hung it up, and then began grooming her. I finished and gave her a treat, then I made my way into the house. My dad and Augustus sat watching an American rodeo on the tele. I went up to my room and changed into sweat pants and a tank top, and then laid down in bed. Nala snuggled up to my side. I took a picture of her laid against me and posted it on Twitter with the caption,
"I'm alive."