Night Wolf Part 2

The Man That Was Broken and Loved

Alistair sighed, "During those 5 years, I met Mahina, she was recently bitten and I offered to show her around even though she chose the wrong place to get bitten with that pack. I love her so much, she became someone who became like a sister to me. She was the one to tell me what my ex was doing was wrong and so unhealthy. But as someone who was so in love, I didn't believe her. I didn't want to believe it. I thought she was just jealous of my relationship, I hated who I was, how I treated her and dismissed her concerns. Guess it's what he wanted to happen. With everything that happened, the pain and torment, she did her best to be a friend and never let it out again whenever we were together to hang out. I knew I was so deep in love with that piece of shit but I didn't care. I still love him, it was a difficult time for me. So difficult with his usual abuse, that the last time he choked me out, I felt pure terror."

Taking a deep breaths and calm himself down with Seth listening and feeling so sorry for Alistair, listening more to his story.

Alistair sighed, "I endured everything he ever did to me, I still love him but when he choked me that badly, I thought I was going to die. I truly felt complete terror he was going to finally end me. Unfortunately I lived and that's when I really realized it was bad. So bad that I couldn't keep living like that. He did it so many times but I don't know why it felt so different. I ended up telling Mahina and with her support and never judging me, she was there. I love her so much that she was willing to help me get out of that relationship knowing it'll be risky. He was stronger, bigger and vicious wolf, I needed to get out, so desperately leave him and the pack. The pack was nothing but toxic and horrible, never feeling safe around those wolves, especially my father who threatened to kill me if I ever spoke to him. And I believed him, of course. So Mahina and I quietly came up with plans to leave but those plans never went through. He eventually found out that night, and he got so angry, he yelled at me, and I shouted back for the first time which surprised the hell out of him. Which angered him even more, we fought, he fought and knocked me out and when I came to, the whole place was on fire. And it got me, this burn mark is a reminder of that night."

Seth softly gasp, horrified of what happened to Alistair, what he endured and the things he went through.

Alistair continued, "Whatever caused the fire, I always suspect he didn't put his cigarettes out, but the house caught on fire. It got me, it burned me pretty bad, I tried to get out, it was so bad that it was difficult to breathe. More difficult to... To see my ex trapped under the beam, and you know what's the most messed up part? After everything he ever did to me, the abuse, I still loved him. Wanted to get him out of there and save him because I still love him."

Seth's heart ached as he listened to Alistair's words, the conflicted emotions that he had felt in that moment of chaos and destruction.

He could understand why Alistair had wanted to save his ex, even though he knew it was wrong and that the man had hurt him so deeply. It was a natural instinct to try and save someone you cared about, even if they didn't deserve it.

"It's okay," he whispered, stroking Alistair's hair gently. "It's normal to feel conflicted in a situation like that. You were in a traumatic situation, and your emotions were all over the place. You did the best you could. But saving him, it must've been such a truly confusing situation to do that." Seth caressed his cheek, "Did you save him?" Taking out that huge deep breath of air.

Alistair shake his head, "No, I didn't. I wanted to save him because I still love him but I knew if I did, another beating I would receive from him, I would definitely die from it. It's so messed up but I made the decision to leave, leave before the fire takes me out. It was hard but I had to do it. I had to leave, hearing him he'll kill me for leaving him. With my emotions all over the place, the best I could, I got the hell out of there and fast, once I was out, I felt a huge weight has been lifted but couldn't completely get to enjoy it as Mahina completely takes me away from the fire and away from the area. Everyone believes I died along with him, in truth, the old me did. I did died in that fire with him and everyone can believe it if they want. After Mahina took me away, I finally let all the emotions out and cried, he made me suffer so much over the years, making me believe that was love. And in truth, I still believe it, I built up my walls, refusing to let any romantic feelings in. Hooking up with any guy, never caring about what more they want from me. I never got into another relationship in fear that I would find another one like him. Or worse, becoming just like him that I hurt that poor and innocent guy who doesn't deserve to be treated like shit! Even if I did try and be in a relationship, his damn voice will come and remind me that I don't deserve to love anyone, reminding me I would be just like him, always in my head and torturing me and screwing up my mind. He did anyway, screwed up my perspective on love and what a relationship should be. Even though I've seen how incredible Porter and Alaska are, their relationship and marriage. Even from Quill and Lycaon, their relationship being so good and healthy, yet I'm always on edge whenever they have a disagreement, always on alert to go in and do something but they always managed to work it out and do well. Those four are the best and know what to do with their relationships." Tears falling down, his heart beating fast, feeling so envious of their relationship that Alistair's always ready to calm the situation down even though it's not his place.