mute

chapter 42

Chapter: A Day of Struggle

The morning started with a sense of unease for Billie. As the first rays of sunlight filtered through her curtains, she stirred awake, immediately noticing something was different. Before her thoughts could even fully form, her mouth blurted out a loud, uncontrollable "Beep-beep!"

The sound startled her, and she froze, her hands clutching the edges of her blanket. A new tic, she thought, panic creeping in. This wasn’t the first time she’d developed a new vocal tic, but each time it happened, it felt overwhelming and foreign.

“Beep-beep!” The tic came again, louder this time. Billie whimpered, pulling the blanket over her head.

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Morning Support

Her mom, sensing something was off, knocked gently on Billie’s door before stepping inside.

“Good morning, sweetheart,” her mom said, signing the words as she spoke.

Billie peeked out from under the blanket, her eyes already glassy with unshed tears. New tic. Beep-beep, she signed quickly, her hands trembling.

Her mom knelt beside the bed, her face soft with understanding. “Oh, Billie. I know that’s hard. It’s okay to feel upset,” she said, signing as she spoke. She reached out, offering Billie her favorite fidget toy, a soft, squishy stress ball shaped like a cat.

Billie clutched the toy, squeezing it tightly as her body began to rock back and forth—a comforting motion that helped her feel grounded. Her mom gently rubbed her back.

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Breakfast Challenges

When Billie came downstairs for breakfast, the "Beep-beep!" tic continued intermittently. Each time it came out, her cheeks flushed with embarrassment, and she buried her face in her hands.

Finneas was already at the table, munching on cereal. He looked up and signed, New tic?

Billie nodded, letting out another "Beep-beep!" Her hands fluttered in frustration.

Finneas grinned softly, signing back, It’s okay. You’re still you. Want me to make your toast today?

Billie hesitated, then nodded. Finneas making her toast was a small comfort, and she felt her shoulders relax a fraction.

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Overwhelmed by Routine

As the day went on, Billie’s struggles grew. The sound of dishes clinking in the kitchen was too sharp, the sunlight pouring through the windows was too bright, and the texture of her socks was suddenly unbearable.

Her body tensed as she paced the living room, her hands clapping rhythmically as her vocal tic chimed in again. “Beep-beep!” Her frustration built as she signed to her mom, Everything is too much!

Her mom nodded, stepping closer. “How about we take a break? Maybe the sensory corner?”

Billie hesitated, then allowed her mom to guide her to the small corner of the living room they’d set up just for her. It was filled with soft pillows, a weighted blanket, and calming sensory items. Billie sat down, pulling the blanket over her shoulders as she reached for a glitter jar. She shook it gently, watching the swirling sparkles settle, her breathing slowing as she focused.

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Afternoon Walk

Later, when Billie seemed more stable, her dad suggested a short walk outside to help reset her mood. At first, she resisted, signing furiously, No. Too much outside.