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Forgive me.

Forgive me for here I am again, posting a random stuff about my life.

Like someone actually cares.

I don't know anymore. I'm an emotional wreck right now.

I feel the same intensity of emotion as when Will left the band.

The only difference is that I'm crying of joy right now.

I just can't believe it... A four-chair turner on The Voice of China... Just... Wow.

And to think that I haven't even seen the audition yet. I'm a poor puppy who is lost in this world of unfathomable sorrow and doubt.

I just love him so much. Seeing him grow from IM5 up to this point... It's just... Wow.

I can't even form the right words to say. Usually I'll call up Sapphire but I don't have load right now... And I just had to cry alone.

I... Ugh. You probably wouldn't care about me. But you're still reading this, so I expect that you do. It's just... Ugh.

My world literally revolves around Will. It's so unhealthy, and I'm starting to hate myself for loving someone who can't and won't actually love me back. Who am I, anyway? I just a crazed fan who can't even see him in person.

I beat none of those fans who can actually get to go to his shows. Those are the people he actually remembers. But me? I'm no one. I'm a fog in the middle of a dead wasteland of unrepeated hopes and dreams.

I don't even know why I posted this here. I have a rant book but I felt like there will be a higher probability of actually finding someone who can understand here. I don't know.

I'm torn with being so happy and being extremely dreadful. I can't even understand myself. I'm an emotional wreck, slowly sinking into a sea of mixed thoughts and dark emotions you wouldn't want to know.

Please, ugh. I just ugh.

A four-chair turner... Wow. This is so Will. Congratulations, buddy. I know you won't see this but congratulations. :)

xx