Beg ✟ h.s. au (M)

t h i r t y - o n e

"Angry people are not always wise."

"What the fuck do you want?" I hissed into my phone. I closed the door behind me, leaving Harry alone in my room. Claiming it was an important call, he didn't second guess anything as I left the room with the phone to my ear.

"Oh baby, don't act like you don't want to talk to me. I know you love my company." His dreadful voice laced through the speaker. My blood pressure skyrocketed at this immense stress. Although I have no one to blame but myself, I can't help but want to kill this asshole for ruining something good for once.

"Whatever, just what do you want?" I asked again only growing more irritable and anxious with each passing second. Fuck Brett.

"You're with him now, aren't you?" His voice laced with wicked humor. The thought of me actually caring about someone was something so amusing to this asshole.

"What. Do. You. Want?" I spoke each word slowly, trying my hardest not to go off on this piece of shit low life. That would only raise suspicion, and my number one priority as of now is to keep this information from ever getting to Harry. Especially coming from this asshole.

"Hm, that persistent are we? I hope I didn't interrupt anything. I may hate the kid, but I would never want to stop someone from getting the best head of their life. I know I've said it before, but you really do have the mouth of a goddess babe." I could just picture the smug ass smirk on his face now.

"Shut the fuck up and tell me why you called, or I'm hanging up." I seethed through gritted teeth. I was on my last straw with him. For me to be wasting my time with this piece of trash when I could be in the presence of Harry was enough, but for him to continue to waste my time and pester me on was not something I was going to tolerate for much longer. For all I know Brett could be nothing more than empty threats.

"Oh babe, I wouldn't hang up if I were you. Actually, I just wouldn't make me angry period. Who knows what I'd do if I were upset with you. I mean, you could only imagine, right." A large breath was exhaled through my nose as I tensed in anger and fear. The two a deadly mix of emotions, one of which I didn't encounter often. Or ever at that.

His crazed laugh echoed through the speaker as he took my silence as humor, then continued to speak. "Good girl. Now, the reason I called was to tell you that I have come up with the proposition for you. I assumed you'd want to hear it?"

No, I didn't want to hear it.  I wanted Brett to get hit by a car, and leave me the fuck alone forever. I wanted him to stop jeopardizing the only good thing I have going for me now. But most of all, I wanted to be able to rewind and realize how much Harry meant to me before I had the opportunity to fuck it all up.

But life doesn't work like that, and I can't help but fuck up a good thing.

This time though, I decided that I would take any precaution to keep this from getting to Harry. I can't have him leave me. Not now.

With a deep breath and a broken soul I replied. "Yes. I would like to hear it."

--

I tucked my phone into my back pocket, the words still lingered in the back of my head. My heart ached, and I couldn't stop my hands from shaking rapidly. I didn't want to do it. I wanted everything to be okay, and happy. I wanted to have a future and become someone I wanted to be, not be dragged back by my past and relapse into the person I was, or am I suppose.

I inhaled a shaky breath before opening the door of my bedroom. I saw Harry laying back on the bed, his eyes attached to the ceiling, aimlessly occupying himself waiting for me to return. He didn't notice my return until I closed the door behind me. His head popping up to see who had entered.

Once his eyes met mine a smile etched into his face, bringing his body up to sit on the edge of the bed. "There you are. Took a while. Who was it?" He asked, holding out his arm, inviting me to stand between his legs as he spoke to me.

I slowly took his hand, fitting in between his legs as his hands wrapped around the back of my thighs. My own wrapping around his neck.

He means so much to me.

"Just uh- just someone calling about the bills again." I spoke as this happened quite often, but we somehow would always manage by the end of the month to scrape together the money. A sad truth, but something that wasn't a surprise to me.

His face fell with sympathy, his eyes filling with an emotion that was genuine, when what I had said was nothing more than a pure lie. I felt bad lying about this, but I couldn't exactly tell him who I was actually on the phone with, or better yet, why I was on the phone with him.

I placed a hand under his chin, the other falling to his broad shoulder. Upon moving his gaze my hand moved to the side of his cheek. My thumb caressing gently against the skin. "Hey, it's okay. Don't worry about it."

"I just, I wish I could help." He said bringing his hand over my own. He slowly encased his hand around mine. I shook my head at his reply, but my heart only ached more.

I brought my hands to his chest and slowly pushed him back making him lay down again. My legs crawled to his sides, straddling his waist. The blonde strands curtaining around my face as I looked down at his beautiful figure. "Don't worry about it." I said trailing my hands towards the bottom of his shirt, my hands making their way underneath. My eyes filled with lust as the fabric bunched up as I went further. "The only thing you need to worry about is where we left off."

And with that I pulled the shirt over his head, and connected our lips in passion. Our bodies soon intertwining into a mess of limbs and parts.

This was the only way I could handle the problems at hand. From Brett's threats, and my past to my love for someone so pure, I had no clue how to handle any of it. I was an utter mess and this, this was the only way I knew how to convey any feeling. Wether it be anger, or fear, or pain, this was all I had.

And so when Harry's protected length had entered me, I let all my emotions pour into it. With each gentle thrust and voiced concern as to if I was okay or not, my emotions were felt more and more. I was determined to make him understand. I only wish I could display the feelings I had through this unspoken connection.

Through gentle kisses, and feather-like touches. Through sweet nothings, and wandering fingertips.

One could only wish though. Sadly, this was the only way I could partially convey the words and emotions I felt. And I pray to whatever God would entertain any help for a sinner like me, that what I was going to do to keep Harry with me.. was the right decision.

/////////

hella's gonna be the death of me :(

what do you guys think Brett's little ultimatum was?!!!?

okay so i got confused as to which comments from last chapter were questions for this chapter or not, so imma just answer any question that was asked in general haha

Any place in the world you want to visit?
- ever since i was little i've had a dream of getting married in Paris & like i know its cliché and lame, but its so pretty haha. I actually told myself i'd take french in high school so i could be able to "talk to my wedding planner" haha

Are there any songs you like by 5SOS?
- they're not my favorite band but I do like their music! I reallly enjoy Beside You & She's Kinda Hot is bombb. I dont listen to them much though!

What do you think of Harrys high note in drag me down?
- DONT GET ME STARTED ITS BEAUTIFUL UGH

Do you think Harry in real life secretly has a daddy kink ?
-FUCK I HOPE SO UGHKSDKQODN

lol okay, so i hope you all have a great week!! i'll see you all soon!

highlight w a question here! :-)

i love you all so much, and i never want you to forget it.

julia xx