Live And Let Die

Part 13: Human Being

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"You look great, stop undermining yourself." Will said as he wrapped his arms around my waist. I was pinning up my long hair, trying to do a messy updo.

"I'm not." I walked into the restroom to grab another tissue to wipe off some of my mascara. "Do we have to go." I wined.

"Um, duh."

It was a New Year's Eve, soon it would be 1986 Hopefully this would signal the turn of a new leaf. William and the band were invited to go to a company party by this record company trying to sign them. I was happy for them, but I wasn't really ready to make any appearances with Will yet. We have a rocky relationship, and I don't want it to be too serious right now. Just something casual and laid back.

"I look hideous." I slumped over Will. He wore a formal red shirt, sleeves rolled, with a black tie and slacks.

"Oh stop," he pulled me off of him and stared at me with a calming smile.

"Ugh, what?"

"You've got something right there." He lifted his thumb up to take off some of my red lipstick, then leaned in to kiss me.

"Noooooooo," I laughed as he kept kissing me. "You're gonna mess it up and then, we will never go out."

"I'm okay with that." He chuckled grabbing my back.

"Oh gosh," I shoved him off. "You're so handsy." I brushed off my red cocktail dress.

"Can we hurry up at least?" He hollered from the bedroom.

"Yes, ready!"

In the taxi, I helped re-tie his tie. He was so nervous, I could feel it in his presence. He always tried acting dominant and assertive, but I knew what he really was like. He was broken and didn't want to be forgotten. He wanted show them all. He's pumped up with revenge and arrogance, that he didn't even know who he was anymore. I knew though. I will always know him.

We arrived at 9 p.m. Like usual, late. Duff and Saul were already filled with bourbon, and for Izzy he stood from the balcony. Nobody knew where Steven was.

"See you in a bit." Will whispered then kissed my ear. He left with the CEO of Geffen Records.

I was alone, and cold. I walked over to Izzy, who was also standing alone. He wore a black formal shirt, slightly unbuttoned, with and nice pair of jeans. His dark brown locks flowed through the wind. I looked down at the floor, trying my best not to make eye contact. It would be a little awkward. He hasn't been over since William and I had become official. I don't blame him, I'd never blame him.

"Isn't it peaceful?" I said nervously. I gripped onto the railing.

"Very," he replied calmly. We stood there silently for a few seconds.

"Wow, this is it." I glanced over at him. He ha a great profile.

"What do you mean?" He kept staring out at the L.A. lights and took a sip of his vodka.

"Your break, the album and everything." He looked at me nonchalantly. I took a deep breath.

"Ya it's really good." He looked away again and took another sip.

"Yep," I tapped my newly polished nails against the railing, a nervous habit. "It's been a while." I nodded.

"Yep, definitely." He gulped.

"You look nice." He closed his eyes as the breeze went by. I copied him.

"I can clean up once in a while." He smiled.

"I like it." I turned my back to the railing, still gripping my hands on it.

"Not too shabby." He straightened his tie.

"Not at all."

"I've missed you." He moved closer to me.

"Same," I got off the railing and walked over to Saul ordering another bourbon.

"I mean two." He shouted to the bartender.

"Thank you dear." I kissed his cheek, he lightly blushed.

"I saw you and bean-pull over there."

"Oh," Saul handed me my drink as I looked down.

"It's a shame."

"What is?"

"Nothing," he looked me up and down. "Where is Will anyways?"

"With whoever runs this place." I took a swig of my bourbon.

"Ah, of course he is." He took a swig of his drink as well. "Always making plans without us, like usual."

"He's not terrible."

"No, but you deserve...never mind." He finished up his bourbon. I slid mine to him. "I think you need this more than me." He pushed it back.

"Maybe," I sucked down the rest. "Later," I walked away.

I sat down on the upper deck at a small table. Waiters would rush back and forth beside me. The time flew by around me. I didn't mind sitting in my thoughts, I wasn't afraid. The cool air started numbing me to the bone. I didn't care, frostbite wouldn't kill me. Only I would kill myself. I never thought of myself as one living to old age. I wouldn't die with a loved one, I would just simply disappear into obscurity. It would be easier. Running away is easy. That's something I needed to stop.

"Hello, sexy." I heard a rambling voice comment. I turned around and smiled. "Why would a beautiful lady like you be sitting by yourself on New Years?" William walked over and sat down.

"Well I actually have a date, and he'd be mad if he knew you were talking to me." I smirked.

"Maybe he won't catch me in time, maybe I'll just take you away with me dear." He grasped my chilly hands to warm them. He rubbed them back and forth soothingly.

"I don't know, my parents told me to never talk to strangers."

"I'm no stranger." He brought my right hand up and pecked it. "Not for long."

"Hey, William!" The CEO came back and signaled Will back.

"I gotta go." He pursed his lips.

I was alone again, I leaned back in my chair to relax. 'Stairway To Heaven' by Led Zeppelin popped on to the loud speakers.

"Can I have this dance?" Izzy asked with his hand out.

"Without a doubt." Grabbed his hand. He pulled me up close to him.

We danced quietly, starring into each other's eyes. It was as if I was floating. I didn't have a need to worry when I was around him. Maybe that's exactly what I needed.

"What do you believe in?" Izzy asked smolderingly.

"I believe in humanity."

"You don't believe in a heaven? No after life?"

"I don't know, but while I'm here I believe in me and those around me. But a god? No."

"Fair enough," he smirked. "I believe in you too."

I looked up at him again, he leaned in close to me. I heard people in the background counting down to midnight. All I could think about was, did I make the right choice?

"Sofie!" It was William calling. I turned around, Izzy let me go. He to me and held me tight. The people stopped counting and fireworks went off. Will leaned in and kissed me passionately. He took in every bit of me and wouldn't let me go. His hands slid up my back like a snake. Our breathing became intertwined. It seemed absolutely perfect from his view. But in the corner of my eye, I saw Izzy walking away with my drink in his hand. "Happy New Year's." William whispered to me seductively in his lower tone. I nodded and kissed his upper lip.

"Happy New Year's."

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"You're tryin' to cover up a big disgrace." Human Being by Guns N' Roses