The Gray Zone

CHAPTER 9

/Jesse's POV/

I drove slowly through Newbury Park and looked at the streets. In the last hours I've learned more about Alexis than ever before I think. That she thinks she ruins everything, that she liked how I phrased things, that her hugs were absolutely perfect. Back when we stood in the sand and she pressed her cute face into my chest I never wanted to let go. Shit I could stare at her the whole day and be pleased. I wanted to take care of her. To make her feel good and important. So she wouldn't be sad anymore. So I wouldn't be that unbalanced anymore.

Absorbed in my thoughts I opened the front door and wasn't even two steps into the hall when Lea stormed towards me. 

"Jesse, who was that girl? Who was she? Is she your new girlfriend?" 

Her voice was still childish and she jumped around me. I laughed out loud and she continued while I took my sneakers off. 

"I've seen you hugging her in front of our house and then you both drove away!"

I walked into the kitchen and began to make two peanut butter and jelly sandwiches while I tried to explain. "Lea, the girl, Alexis, is my friend-"

"Your girlfriend? I'm gonna tell mom!" She gasped in excitement and because I wasn't entirely sure about the things between us so I ignored her guess. 

"No, you won't tell mom because then I'll make sure to steal your phone and text random numbers." That made her silent and I snickered. "She looked really beautiful – I mean she had blue hair!" 

I handed her one of the plates and she immediately began to eat. 

"Yeah... Alexis really is beautiful." My thoughts drifted off again. Her hair fitted the blue of the water so well today... 

"You like her! I know 'cause your cheeks are all red." Lea giggled and then ran to the living room and turned the TV on. 

If she wasn't so damn sweet I'd be mad at her but no. I couldn't. She was such a precious little girl and well she knew that I've had some relationships before but my family was never really involved in them so I guess she was just curios. I took a deep breath and checked in the mirror in the hall if I was still red like Lea had said and then sat down besides my sis and watched some TV. It was something we had always done and still continued and even if it was lame, I think we both kinda enjoyed it.

Later that day I wanted to refuel the car and was about to go out of the door when I heard Lea shouting from her room "Are you going to your girlfriend?" I snickered and denied it. But it was like she could tell me with her silence that she wasn't convinced. 

 After I was done fueling up and twenty-two dollars meager I sat down again and looked behind me to see that Alex's bag was still laying on the middle seat. I stared at it for a moment before the idea of actually bringing it to her occurred to me so I hurried to get on the street again and drove to her house with the biggest smile on my face. I knocked carefully and had to wait for a bit. Inside there were two persons talking and then I heard steps before looking directly at Alexis' mom. Oh good lord why? 

"Hello Linda." I fake smiled and she also greeted me before turning her heads towards the hall. 

"Levi! Your friend Jesse is here." 

"Oh no actually I-" I tried to avoid seeing her brother once more since he didn't seem to like it that much when I hung out with his sister but he was already walking towards me and we both nodded at each other. "Look I was just passing by to give Alex her bag back. She probably left it when I drove her home." 

Luckily Mrs. Marker didn't question further and just frowned "I'm sorry, she's sleeping at the moment, but thank you for bringing it back." I glanced over to Levi who was at least half a head taller than me and handed his mother the bag before looking at her again.