The Gray Zone

CHAPTER 15

/Jesse's POV/

I was laughing at a hilarious story Mikey had told all five of us how Lauren would sneak books into his locker and bag she found interesting so he'd begin to read more. It was actually pretty cute. Their whole relationship was near perfection. Everybody was sure that they would marry each other one day, including me. Then I heard my phone ringing and I accepted the call. 

"Hello?" 

 "Hi Jesse... Er, here's Alexis." her voice was thin and looked over to my boys who all faced me. 

 "Hey Alex." I harrumphed and Zach's eyes got big. 

 "Do you have a moment? I wanna talk to you." She asked and I could feel that there was something wrong.

"Yeah... yes of course." I stumbled and got up, not without bumping into the couch table. Ouch. "Just wait a second." 

I was excited to hear her voice but it seemed like she was upset because of something. Then I remembered the message she had send me earlier. It made me gringe and as soon as I read it I knew he was up to no good. Quickly I got into the kitchen and heard curbed voices from the living room. 

"Okay you have my full attention now." I leaned against a kitchen counter and starred at the white tiles. 

She began to explain "Look, a few hours ago I did a nice thing and it felt fucking terrible." There was a pause and she was searching for words. "I don't know how things are between us, Jesse, and it's not your job to figure my feelings out but – ugh shit. I'm sorry, it's just that... Oh god I am so awkward, sorry." 

 I smiled slightly. "No, you're actually pretty cute." 

 "Stop, you're making it worse." She sighed and my smile faded. "I kissed Sasha – or well, he kissed me and I just went with it – but what I wanted to say is that I kissed someone and the only thing I could feel was the fading memory of your lips against mine and your fingertips burning through my shirt. It felt horrible and I cried afterwards and Sasha comforted me and yeah I'm sorry that I am such a huge fucking mess but I thought I should tell you." 

Alex said everything so fast she had to take a deep breath after finishing. My gaze was still fixed on the tiles. Thank god she still cared about me. 

"Well, thanks for letting me know, Alex. I... I don't really know how to feel about this to be honest." The only thing I want to feel right now is your body pressed against mine I didn't say that out loud but damn this thought made it hard for me to be mad at her. (Was there really a reason to be mad?) "And how are you feeling right now?" 

There was a sigh of relief to be heard. "Terrible, to be honest. I wish I could stop time and figure everything out and now my head is hurting." She frowned. Then a brilliant idea popped into my mind.

"Girl, I'm gonna be at your house in fifteen minutes and then we'll find a way to make time stop for a bit."

Alexis giggled and it made me happier than everything else this week. She made me happy. Alexis made me so fucking happy. And so terrible sad. I ended the call and went back to the boys. 

"It was Alex, right?" Zach asked and I nodded, earning a big grin from Jeremy. "Dude's getting laid tonight." Everybody laughed but I shook my head.