Matthew Espinosa Imagines

Damaged pt. 2

*Colette's POV*

Twenty-nine messages, thirty-eight missed calls, thirty-eight voicemails.

I have been staying at a hotel about a half an hour away from home for a week now. And Matt hasn't given up on reaching out to me for my forgiveness.

The first day was torture, for both of us. My phone would never stop ringing or buzzing. I eventually had to shut it down so that I could stop crying.

Day two was less chaotic, but of course there were the often texts every half hour and a call every two hours.

And around day three or four was when the notifications died down.

And now...they've completely stopped.

I can't bring myself to listen to any of the voicemails or read any of the messages. It would physically kill me.

Of course there were the times of temptation which would get so strong that I almost left on day two.

But I have to stay strong. I have to prove to Matt that I won't just shove this one under the rug.

It was now 10:00 PM, and I couldn't fall asleep, which wasn't surprising since sleep wasn't something that was very easy this week.

I was all cried out over the affair. I haven't moved on, but there's always a point in your sadness where you're all cried out. You can't shed anymore tears and you can't let out one more sob.

You're just...empty.

I lay down on the hotel's cheap and crappy mattress and turn off the lights, leaving my room quiet and dark.

The only thing that was swimming around my mind was the thought of Matt with another girl, and I couldn't handle that.

I quickly pull out my phone and go to Gallery, and then find a video from a long time ago, back when Matt and I were just boyfriend and girlfriend in high school.

I press play, ready for the tears to come back.

The video starts with the lens pointed at Matt's face, which was resting on my lap.

My hand was petting his blonde hair as he gazed up at me, looking so...in love.

"Colette" Matt whispers, acting half asleep.

"Yes?" My freshman voice answers.

"Knock knock" Matt says, smiling.

I picture my smile behind the camera as I say back "Who's there?"

"Olive" Matt whispers, biting his lip so he could contain his grins.

I chuckle. "Olive who?"

"Olive youuuuuu" Matt coos as he puckers his lips and tugs me down to him, kissing me as we laughed at the same time.

My vision becomes blurry with hot tears filling up my eyes.

"I'm in love with you" I hear past Matt whisper to me in the video.

"That's nice" Freshman Colette muses, making Matt wrestle me and the video ending from his cute aggressiveness.

I let my phone drop to the floor as I cry.

Sure the video may have been dumb, and so was Matt's cheesy joke, but back then we seemed so much more...in love. So much more in control of our relationship.

But now it feels like our relationship is just being torn apart.

And I fall asleep to that thought.

_______

I hear shuffling in the dark. My sleepy mood takes over, making me ignore it and fall back into deep slumber.

"Colette" I hear a voice whisper.

Being half asleep, I figured it was just my unicorn robot calling my name, so I just smiled and let it go.

The noises finally came to an end when led me falling back into sleep and continuing my dream of unicorn robot.

But then something different interrupts my slumber. Something way more powerful and more intense.

I feel lips press onto mine passionately, the owner of the lips becoming entranced and getting deeper in the kiss.

I freak out and start kicking and hitting the rapist.

I fly out of bed and yell "I am not getting raped today!" as I turned on the lights and turned to the rapist with the TV remote as a weapon.

And I am shocked to see the rapist was Matthew, who was holding his cheek since I had hit him there.

I jump when I see Matt, since it felt like I hadn't seen him in ages. He looked surprisingly different from our week apart.

His eyes didn't look bright and beautiful anymore. They looked dull and dead. His hair was a mess, he had bags under his eyes and his eyes were a permanent bloodshot red from crying I assume.

"M-Matt..." My lips fumble to say, as I was still scared that there might be a rapist present. "What the hell are you doing here?"

Matt's bottom lip quivers as he answers. "G-Getting my life b-back" he blubbers.

Tears spill out of my eyes all the sudden. I was so sick of tears.

"Matt-" I start to say, but Matt interrupts.

"I know I fucked up. I know I did a horrible, horrible thing. And over this past week I've been thinking a lot. And I've realized that...I don't deserve you. I really don't. You are the most beautiful, amazing and out of this world girl I've ever met. And a douchebag like me doesn't deserve the best girl in the world..." Matt preaches.

I was dead silent. I couldn't say anything. My heart felt like it was being choked and my eyes couldn't stop watering.

Matt continues. "But...if I got a second chance...I would be the luckiest man on the planet. I love you, I want to be with you. I want to be your shoulder to cry on. I only want you. And I promise I won't need a third chance."

I was now silently crying my eyes out. I haven't heard words like that out of Matt's mouth in what feels like forever.

Matt steps closer to me, my instincts making me back away.

Matt face shows how hurt that made him, making me regret it instantly. Matt bites his lip to contain his sobs as he reaches out his hand for me.

I stare at his open hand. I trust him, I know him and I love him. I want him...I need him in my life...

I take his hand.

Matt instantly pulls me into him and holds me in his arms, swaying us back and forth and kissing my wet cheeks.

"Colette" Matt sobs.

"Yes?" I cry back.

Matt brings my face to his and smiles at me.

"Olive you" Matt smiles, making me grin as our lips came together.

_______

Crappy imagine, I know, but I promise there will be better soon!

I love you guys!

- abbyyy xoxoxoxo