Invisible

Chapter 8: Heart to Heart

~Blaze~

A soft knock sounded on my bedroom door. I looked up as the door cracked open and my mom peeked in. Immediately I sat up from where I had been lounging on the bed, texting.

" Hello, My Blazing Sun, can I come in?" She smiled at me, her eyes twinkling with happiness. My mom was almost always happy. It was like her default setting.

"Mom," I groaned, "I've asked you not to call me that!" She took that as a yes and moved into the room, closing and locking the door behind her. Wait. Locking the door? Mom never locked doors. Mom hated locked doors. What the hell was this about? I watched her warily as she moved to the bed and sat next to me. She leaned back against my headboard, turning her head to look at my sitting next to her.

"I heard about what happened," Her voice was quiet,betraying nothing. Mom was always quiet.  I rubbed my hands on my jeans nervously. I really had no idea what to expect. If Mom had heard that meant she had gotten it out of one of my dads and someone was now in the dog house. Mom hated it when my dads kept things from her, usually they claimed it was to protect her or some other dumb excuse like that. Like mom needed anyone to protect her.  Mom put her hand over mine, stilling my nervous rubbing and making me look at her. I swallowed, my nerves peaking despite the loving,understanding look in her eyes. "Why don't you tell me about it?"

"Which part?" I asked ruefully. Mom smiled at me, making me smile back.

"Let's start at the beginning. What really happened at school?" Trust Mom to know there was more to the story. 

I grimaced, "You have to ask Miles for some of it. All I know is I heard some guy  calling him a fag and threatening to pound on him. When I saw the guy, I intervened. He was bigger than me, almost as big as Dad Silas. What else was I supposed to do? It's bad enough I wasn't able to prevent whatever set the asshole off. Family First." The last was said in firm tones. It had been said often enough, preached to us growing up. Hell it was even written on the foyer floor. 

Mom gave a deep sigh, looking saddened by my words. I wondered why. Things like that happened to Miles all the time.  "I so hoped Miles would avoid the treatment your father so frequently got." I shot her a confused look.  When had dad ever been called a fag? Mom caught the look and shook her head, giving me a small, amused smile.

"Not North, Gabriel." Oh yeah, I remember now. Dad Gabe had ended up in the hospital because of some homophobic asshole, despite the fact that he isn't and has never been, gay.
Mom gave me a stern look. "So, you what? Decided to start a fight, rather than let Miles handle things on his own?"

"No, Mom," I shook my head and she looked relieved, "Miles to scared to do anything. Like I said, the guy was huge and in his face.  I gave the guy a chance to walk away, he decided to throw a punch instead."

"Good boy." Mom patted my knee. She looked a bit nervous and I had to wonder about that. Mom was the most confident person I knew. She took a deep breath "Now, about what you overheard.." I stood abruptly and stalked over to the window, staring out it stiffly at nothing. Somehow I hadn't seen this coming and I should have. Both dads had tried to talk to me about it and I had walked away from them. Now I understood the locked door.

"I don't want to talk about it." I bit out the words through gritted teeth. I heard the rustle of Mom getting up from the bed, then felt her hand on the back of my shoulder. I knew she could feel the tension in them. I looked down at her. My Mom. She was so small, especially when next to Dad Silas, but she was the strongest woman I knew. She was the heart and soul of our family. Still didn't mean I wanted to discuss the fact that my dad hated me.

"Oh, My Blazing Sun. So very much like my North Star." What? I was nothing like Dad! Mom saw my face and giggled. I had to stifle the urge to smile, Mom's giggles always made everyone smile.  "Yes, you are. More than you know. That's why he's so hard on you." Okay, now Mom was confusing me. She took my hand and led me back to the bed. I followed reluctantly. I didn't want to hear the platitudes I knew everyone wanted to spout off to me. I had heard him with my own ears, there wasn't anything else to say.

"At your age your Dad had been through so much. Despite that he had your fathers and all, When I met him there was still a small part that was a bit jaded,  a little harsh. He tended to snap and bark first, ask questions later or never. He was grumpy and growly and glared a lot and yes, I know, that doesn't sound much different than he is now. It was worse then. And if it was about me, there wasn't anything or anyone he wouldn't tear apart for just looking at me sideways. Your dad sees so much of himself in you and that frightens him. He wants better for you, Blaze. That is what your dad was trying to say. You won't be him, that slightly harsh, jaded guy he was at your age. Not if he can help it. You will be better, stronger, wiser." Mom paused, looking at me like she was waiting for something but I didn't know what so I just sat there, my mind reeling. She let go of the hand she was holding to reach up and push back a stray bit of hair from my forehead. "He just doesn't know how to make that happen. So, maybe he's going about it wrong because that's the only way he knows how to handle things." The look Mom was giving me was pleading with me to understand, begging me to see my dad through her. I don't know though.  Could she be right? Dad had a tendency to blow, we all knew that but we also knew he was mostly bluster. Was he really afraid of me turning out like him? What the hell was so wrong with him? Despite the fact that we couldn't seem to get along anymore, I love my dad. He's an incredible person. I'd  give anything to be half the man he is.

Mom must have seen something of my thoughts on my face because she smiled and seemed to relax a bit, "Your father loves you,Blaze. More than anything. Just hold onto that, Okay?" I  nodded, I couldn't promise to not fight with him anymore, or anything but I could at least remember that he apparently didn't hate me after all.

"Good." Mom patted my knee and stood up, "so, any  chance I  can get you to confirm  these rumors that some girl  has caught your eye?" Seriously? I told him that in private! I shook my head and Mom gave a big, fake sigh.

"Well, you can't blame a mom for trying." Mom smiled as she began slipping out the door. At the last moment, she turned her head back to me. "Oh, I almost forgot in all the drama. Your dads and I will be going out of town in a couple weeks. Please try to stick around and Help Scott and Mal with the little ones." I resisted the urge to roll my eyes as she blew me a kiss and left. Like Scott would ever let me help with the younger sibs. I was going to have to find some way to stick around, since Mom had asked I would, AND keep from killing the self righteous little ass. I would figure it out but for now I needed to get some sleep. I had a date to pick up a girl in the morning.