The Alpha's Addiction [BXB]

Chapter 54: Proud

I'm so sorry for how long it's been..! It was my first semester at a new college,, plus a few mental breakdowns along the way. I missed my babies so much ahhh😭 Also!! New story idea formulating in this brain of mine. I'm pretty excited.

CYRUS

I look down at my mate's sleeping form curled up against me, his little face smushed into my chest, and my heart physically hurts. He looks so exhausted, small and fragile in my arms. I held him for the longest time earlier, soothing his cries as he came down from his adrenaline high of telling me everything, but I still don't want to let go. I want to keep him close always, away from those that would hurt him. That have hurt him.

What Koa said they did to him--The knowledge that alphas so much bigger than him took pleasure in hurting him, beginning when he was a pup no less, makes my blood boil. He'd been a fucking pup. An omega, completely vulnerable to their abuse with absolutely no one to protect him. The pain of that is so intense my throat constricts, sadness and fury welling up in my very soul for the torture he went through.

I want to kill his parents for their role in this. I want to kill Zacan. I want to kill every single person that laid a hand on him. How anyone could think to harm the precious creature in my arms is unfathomable, and I can't help but agonize over it, even if I give Koa the strong, stable front of an alpha he can depend on. Because he can. Doesn't mean I'm not filled with rage beyond belief, brimming with the need to murder the ones that did this. I won't sit quietly and let monsters like that live.

I've always known, or at least heavily suspected Koa had been abused. I wasn't aware to what extent and wanted him to tell me in his own time, on his own terms, but Zacan and his abduction took that away from him. I could tell whatever it was—the shame, the guilt—was eating away at him. He couldn't bear that burden alone any longer.

And after hearing what was done to him, a lot more clicks into place. His general fear and anxiety surrounding sex and touch. The teeth and claw shaped scars in intimate places. They're faint, and I don't think he's aware that some of them exist, and he doesn't need to be. Looking at them hurts. Watching his reflexes, his eyes searching a room anxiously, always ready for a threat, the way he flinches at the littlest of movements. The fear on his face when he's not in his right mind and all he can see me as is an alpha so much stronger than himself. The way he sees sexuality entwined with violence, punishment. The fact that he's automatically put me on a pedestal for not harming him. It hurts more than anything.

Zacan capturing him is an unforgiveable mistake that I will carry with me for the rest of my life. Koa must have felt so alone. Pregnant and utterly hopeless, thinking his alpha had abandoned him and our pup. And then that fucking rapist beat him black and blue, forced himself on him--

My wolf seethes beneath the surface, jaws gnashing with a fierce growl, the sole need to lay into Zacan, tear him apart, tear them all apart, overwhelming.

I force my breathing to slow, my fingertips twitching as I reign it in, heart still thunderous in the chest Koa lays against. I don't want to wake him. He needs this rest. I ground myself by gazing at his face, taking in that cute little nose that scrunches up when he's annoyed, the adorable freckles sprinkled all over.

He murmurs in his sleep, burrowing in closer to my body heat. I smile at the action despite the turmoil inside me, laying a kiss against his forehead.

You are safe with me. Always.

*

I doze off eventually, waking up somewhere around midnight when Koa shifts against me.

"Cyrus, where's Oliver?" Koa whispers, curiosity in his tone but no concern. I feel silly but gratified that it shows he trusts me with Oli.