"My sword is one inch away from slicing your neck. My victory is one inch away, yet why can't I do it, Althea? What kind of spell have you cast on me to have me thinking about you all day?!"
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Byeol meets a tragic death at age nineteen...
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I am a monster.
No, not the type one sees in nightmares. I don't have a forked tail or pointy teeth. I don't nurture a strong desire for blood or violence. I'm not the boogeyman. I'm not the monster your parents threaten you with when you don't eat your vegetables.
I am a monster. Yet, nobody is more afraid of me than I, myself, am.
I wasn't born without a heart. I wasn't always like this. Or so father used to say. All I remember are gloved hands and hours of isolation, that sometimes his words just come off as a way of comfort rather than the truth.
Even now, as I clip my locket secure, my hands are gloved. When I take my brother's hand in mine, my hands are gloved.
"Keep it with you," Aias told me. "It'll protect you," he continued, and I smiled, overjoyed by my brother's care.
My brother is the most important person in my life. Even though I grew up mostly in my own part of the palace, isolated, Aias didn't let that fact keep him from coming to see me often. He recently took on the role of emperor, after our father's mysterious death. Aias seems to know more about it than he lets on. It doesn't bother me. I knew what father felt for me was never truly love. It was something; something more than what he felt for Aias, but it wasn't love like a father is supposed to feel. I learned that fact when I was thirteen, reading one of my favorite books in the palace's library. That library was my only 'escape' from the palace, until I was fourteen and allowed to travel the rest of the imperial grounds, and sometimes even the capital.
Despite everything, and how it may sound, I never felt the need to sulk in depression. My curse, as terrifying as it is, never truly affected me, except for times like these.
I'm happy.
"Thank you, Aias!" I heard my excited voice, even as I was slowly drifting away to a different place. A place I didn't particularly like. When he turned away, I shut my eyes tight, shook my head, and let the thoughts be brushed aside.
"Stop scaring her, Aias." Althea, his fiancée and soon to be empress approached us. Althea, as far as I know, was always an obstacle in my brother's eyes, until they were forced to work together, for something he won't tell me, and fell in love. Their story sounds straight out of a fairy tail. I've never said this out loud, but sometimes I envy them. Both of them, for finding their person.
Am I ever going to be able to find my person? I don't know. A small part of my brain, one I shut out immediately, said no. But I don't let bad thoughts taunt me. I'm an optimist. Despite my previous words, my life isn't all that bad. After all, I'm a princess. Father used to tell me little girls from the capital wish they were me. At first, I didn't understand what he meant. Now I do. My life, in theory, is perfect. I wake up in luxury, I fall asleep in luxury. I own more dresses than I can count in a lifetime, and I have a person for every little thing. Sometimes I think I'm too comfortable.
