𝗨𝗚𝗟𝗬 // 𝗦𝘁𝗲𝘃𝗲 𝗛𝗮𝗿𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘁𝗼𝗻

058

"I love you."

I'm taken back, stumbling over my shoes as his eyes fill with broken yearning, a grief for something he hasn't even lost yet.

I go to speak, he stops me,
"Please don't say anything."

I don't, mouth shut tight as I let him continue.
His words are soft, filled with knowing and unfortunate want, almost begging,

"I just want to be a boy, confessing to a girl...hoping she could like him back.. just for a moment longer."

I let us stand in comfortable silence as he squeezes his eyes shut, possibly imagining a reality where I say it back, where I pick him.
Another universe.

His lips form a whisper, "I've always lived in fantasy worlds.. this is the first time I ever wished it was real."

Brown eyes reluctantly open, the air dancing between us suddenly lighter as his features relax, prepared for rejection.

I don't give it.
What use in saying the truth already known and breaking his heart further?

When I say nothing in return, he smirks at my unexpected silence and carries on, glancing behind us for a moment before he leans closer and whispers,
"You know I broke a very big promise by telling you that," I raise my brows in surprise, he leans back, "but it was worth it."

The blue hue of the sky highlights his features, the crease in his brow,
"Because if something happens I just- I wanted you to know."

I can hear his heart beating out of his chest as I take a step closer, leaning towards his cheek before I gift it a small kiss, it's not out of love, we both know that, even if he lets out a tiny gasp in response.
Instead, it's out of a deep, beautiful, friendship.

When I move back, a cheaky smile is planted on my lips, "you know, I think Steve's wrong," he looks confused, "even as a decoy, you, Eddie Munson, are a warrior."

Because what he just did was brave. Damn brave.

Scratching his neck awkwardly, he's laughing as if he doesn't truly believe it, "come on princess, look at me," he gestures over himself, "guys like me don't win the battle."

He goes to continue his sentence, but fades out the letters instead. It doesn't matter, I know what he was going to say,

Or the girl.

I'm reminded of myself last year, believing I wasn't good enough to fight, believing I wasn't good enough to live a life of adventure.
I think of my mother's words and how she implemented those thoughts, shoving them further inside my heart.

"Eddie, you are worth so much more than you think."

He disregards me, "You're just saying that to be nice."

I shake my head as tears stain my eyes, worrying wholeheartedly about my friend.
Eddie had always been there, he didn't even know how much.

When I tried to ditch every club I was in, he grabbed me by the collar of my shirt and said, "let's roll for it," pointing a finger my way as he proclaimed, "you roll higher then 16, you get to leave, lower you stay." It wasn't a fair bet, but I took it, begrudgingly, anyways.

I rolled a one.

Hellfire had been the only happiness I had at school for a while, sure people smiled and talked to me now, the famous new royalty of Hawkins, even if only by courtship.