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My mother was never really there.

Physically she was present but mentally she was somewhere else.. maybe being a better parent, maybe trying harder.
I used to think it wasn't fair to say she didn't try, I mean she provided a roof over my head, she talked to my best friend, she occasionally laughed and made dinner.
But she wasn't there.

I never had a single hug from her when my father died.
For a while she didn't really talk to me either. It was simply hums of hello or goodbye; only when I lost another did she really seem to notice my presence again.

So she sent me to therapy. And I didn't protest. Unlike my mother I wanted the help and I was aware I needed it, I wasn't going to let myself wallow in pain, even if I was often trapped in the same cycles of doing so. She believed I was broken and she was right..

The world is still fuzzy for a couple minutes, Nancy tries to explain what happened but the words feel like mush. They make no sense and fly through my brain.

"We saw her at the hospital.." she explains, "she told us she was just checking on Miss Driscoll, but then she started acting strange and.." Nancy trails off and I begin to piece things together, "she became part of the mind flayer..." I mumbled under my breathe, understanding overwhelming me.

Going to therapy was one of the best things that could've happened to me.
It got me to think about my life, realise the way I was treating myself. Sure sometimes I didn't want to be there but that's because of my mothers endless nagging making it feel like a chore, but the truth is I honestly don't think I'd be standing here with these wonderful people around me if it weren't for those sessions.

In many ways Miss cook was like a mother to me, and now I'd lost her too.
I feel every bone in my body become numb as my heart stops, the image of this lovely woman merging into a monster forcing itself into my brain.
My newly built castle was crumbling.

Steve brings me to the side of the room, leaning over to whisper in my ear, his hair flopping forwards, "hey.. I want you to go to Murray's cabin."
I lean away, taken aback and confused, "w-what?" Did he not want me to go with them to the radio?

"You deserve a break from- well all of this, at Murray's you'll be safe."
I process his words, understanding where he's coming from but one fear weighing at my mind, so with my eyes low I confess, "what if I lose you too?" I choke on my words, tears threatening to spill.

"You'll never lose me."
And just like before he's tipping my chin up with his finger and maybe some would say I'm naive or just love struck, but I believe his words. I really believe them.

His eyes dart between mine before they flutter down to my lips, his breath shaking as if he's nervous. "R-Ruby.." I've never heard him stutter before, "when this is over there's a lot of things I.. would like to say.."

I raise an eyebrow and giggle at the blush creeping on his cheeks, "but.. maybe it's best if I said one of them now so.. uh.." he moves his hand behind his neck and scratches at his hair awkwardly, "would you um.. would you wanna go out sometime?"

My eyes go wide, "on a date?"

He rolls his eyes before looking at me with that genuine, beautiful smile, "on a date."
Steve's cool facade fades away as he starts mindlessly rambling, "I mean I never really got that answer from you in the bathroom and I'd really like to know so I figured hey why not ask especially since we might all-"

"I like you too."
The interruption causes him to freeze, the last words of his sentence still oozing out,

"-die...."

His mouth forms a small circle as he blinks at me, clearly embarrassed and he composes himself for a moment, "you.. you really do?"
It's a strange concept to me, being chased by Steve Harrington, in all my years I never thought that's how it would go.
"Yes," I giggle out, trying to hold in the bursting feeling in my heart, I feel like I'm about to explode, a fluttering warmth creeping up inside my chest.

He smiles and launches towards me in an unexpected attack, picking me up by the hips and swinging me around, so much I can't help but loudly laugh at the gesture, a feeling of happiness overcoming me, one I've never felt before.
This might be one of the best moments of my life.

Once he puts me down I notice a smirking Dustin in the corner of my eye, leaning towards Erica casually, "I guess he finally told her huh?"

Did everyone know except me?!

***

Steve had apologised before he headed off for asking me on a date during times of such turmoil, but I didn't mind, I was glad to feel something happy before the Great War.
Nancy gathers the kids after they say their goodbyes, Will hugging his mother tighter than I've ever seen and a part of me starts to break.

For a moment I'd forgotten.
Miss Cook did hug me once, it was my birthday in 84. I always organised something small to celebrate, liking the routine, I would receive a poorly made birthday cake from Robin,( as tradition) and usually a pair of tights from my mother.

But my mother didn't show up that year.
And I didn't have a party.

Instead I spent the day of my birthday standing in the rain over the coffin of a girl I once called my friend.
Despite the happiness of finally getting closure, Miss cook told me in our session "that's a horrible way to spend your birthday," while squeezing me tighter than my mother had in a year.
Maybe it was the stress of my plans being broken, or maybe it was my former best friend being set free, but I'd cried into her shoulders.
She'd said sorry afterwards, saying it was unprofessional to hug me but she hated to see someone with such shine be so dull.

I took comfort in those words.

Nancy ushers us out of the doorway, car keys in hand as everybody piles through the doors, I sit in the back, stomach twisting as I watch the girl in the drivers seat struggle with her car.

"You can't be serious come on!"

Lucas pipes up from besides will, "didn't your mum just buy this car?"

"Yes, I'm sure it's fine!" She's breathless though, sweaty curls sticking to her forehead, "did you leave the lights on?" Will questions, his words quickly denied by the brunette.

"Do we have gas?"

"Yes!"
The engine sputters more, leaving us in the back to wait, an eery feeling falling over us. From the corner of my eye I notice Will reach to touch his neck, a strange look flashing across his eyes that I'd never seen before.

Nancy and Jonathan exit the car, opening the bonnet to check the engine when a revving sound takes over, twisting our eyes to the noise.
If I didn't have good eyesight I may not have seen who was in the car at the end of the parking lot, but unfortunately I could make out the look of disgust on his face.

Billy Hargrove.
He was never nice to me, never nice to anyone. In fact he'd said some things to me I'd never wish on anyone, which is why the confusion of how and why he was present couldn't help but enter my mind.

But from the way Nancy shouted for us to get back into the mall I could tell that once again, he wasn't the good guy.

***

A/N:
Fun fact, I wrote this chapter while suffering from a concussion <3

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