How Do U Want It?

iv

"Daddy, I'm home!" I call out as I placed my backpack on the kitchen table.

"I'm," my dad spoke, but his words were interrupted with a cough, "I'm in here." He managed to shout out from his room. His voice sounded weak.

He had been feeling under the weather recently, thus him staying home from work, and me still walking back and forth to school.

"Daddy, you're still sick." I say in sorrow as I entered his room.

"It's just a small cold. I'm fine. Its just a cold." My dad spoke in a hoarse voice.

"Daddy you've been like this since the beginning of October, it's November now. When you gonna do somethin' about it?" I sat on the bed with him.

He coughed harshly before responding. "I'm fine, trust me."

"Go to the doctor, just to be sure." I pleaded.

He nodded slowly, "Alright I'll go. First thing tomorrow mornin'."

I thanked him, and left out the room.

Today was Thursday, only one more day of hell.

I used to like school, but I couldn't bear to see Tupac and Jada together. It's been 2 months since I seen him and Jada practically swallowing eachother against that tree.

And Faith started dating Big, so I've been hanging with Snoop way more often. He joked and said that we should date. And to be honest, I would date Snoop. But it'd be weird, considering the fact that we've already built a brother/sister relationship.

Despite it all, we all hung out everyday as a group. But now it's not the same as before.

Seeing as I didn't have anything else to do, I decided to do my homework. Lately, I've been slipping. For some reason, I always forget that I've been assigned homework. It's been like this for a while now.

Tonight I only had Literature, and that's it. This should be done in no time.

I sat at my desk in my room, finishing my work and just thinking really. Ever since the night of my party, I've been talking to Eric.

That same night, I came back while everyone was leaving. Eric told me that whenever I saw him, I could always go and talk to him. So now he's like my hood therapist.

When my dad would be at work, I'd be across the street at Dre's house to kill time. Dre was like a big brother to me, so it wasn't a big deal; he didn't mind. Eric also came over Dre's house alot, so I actually vented to the both of them.

I told them about problems at home, even the problems at school. I told them about Jada, Eric told me to knock her out. But Dre immediately put that to a halt.

Their friendship was funny, they were like brothers. It's so backwards though, Dre is about 6 feet, Eric is 5 feet, 5 inches. You'd think Dre was older but nope. Eric was 22; Dre was 20.

Besides Eric and Dre, there was also O'Shea, but we called him Cube. Lorenzo, but we called him Ren. And Antoine, whom we called Yella since he was so bright in skin color.

O'shea and Ren were only 16, so I saw them both in school alot.

I hung out with older people because their point of view on life intrigued me. They've been through much more than what people my age have been — so they more than likely have something valuable to say.

Before I could continue my thought train, I heard a loud thud downstairs. I immediately got up, and ran down the steps. My dad must have dropped something.

"Dad, what'd you drop?!" I say, sprinting to his room.

Instead of me seeing my dad trying to pick up something, I found him unconscious on the floor.