Surviving

eleven

Sunday approached faster than I thought and I can't seem to shake a feeling of nerves and excitement. After my talk with Wilmer at the café, I forgot about all of the messed up family shit for a while and actually socialized with someone outside of my usual group. Don't get me wrong, I love Big Ash and everyone at the house - especially Nova - but sometimes it's nice to talk to someone different. Someone with a different life to mine.

I don't even know what would be considered appropriate church clothing, so I've settled for dark skinny jeans, an off the shoulder sweater and flats. It'll have to do because the only other clothing I own is my work clothes and I know for damn sure that they wouldn't go down well at a place of God and holiness.

"Where are you going?" Nova asks me while walking over to our bed. She still shares a room with me and has become seriously attached to me. A couple times she's even slipped out the word 'mom', causing my heart to flutter.

"I'm going to church, and you're coming with me baby girl" I reply, smiling over at her before turning back to the mirror to finish my make up.

"Church? Why?" she questions, appearing by my side, watching me as I apply a final touch of mascara.

"Well, I met a guy that wants to help me - to help us - and I thought that it was worth a shot. So what do you say we go to a café for breakfast and then meet up with him?" I reply, turning away from the mirror to bend down to Nova's height, tucking some loose strands of hair behind her ear.

"Sounds good" she smiles before copying my own actions, tucking my hair behind my ear. I can't help but laugh a little at how adorable she is. She's the reason why I haven't given up yet.

Thankfully, I'm not too shaky today since I'm still running off the fix I took last night - well, more like early this morning - so Nova and I quickly grabbed our things and headed over to meet Wilmer at the café.

* * * *

"Ah there you are, I thought you were gonna stand me up" Wilmer laughs as Nova and I approach him, walking hand and hand since I know how nervous she is around older guys. "And who's this sweet girl?" he adds, causing Nova to hide behind me slightly.

"This is Nova. Sorry, she gets a little nervous around other people" I reply while twisting my upper body to wrap my arm around Nova's shoulders for comfort.

I watch as Wilmer gives me a sympathetic smile - obviously sensing the reasons why Nova's so scared - before kneeling down to her level. Nova moves her body closer to mine but her eyes never leave Wilmer's. It's almost as if her mind is battling against her body, unsure of what to do.

"Hi Nova, my name's Wilmer" he says softly, smiling at Nova while she brings one hand to her mouth, nibbling on her sleeve. "Demi has told me so much about you, I hope we can be friends one day. And I promise you, I won't hurt you like those other guys did, okay? I promise" he adds, never once breaking his gaze with her.

Nova slowly nods in response before wrapping her arms around my waist. I giggle at her shyness since at home she's anything but. Normally it takes me ages to peel her off the walls and to quieten down.

"So, breakfast?" Wilmer asks, and I'm internally thanking him for moving the conversation on because I'm currently in a state of I don't even know what. Watching Wilmer talk so sweetly to Nova to try and make her feel more comfortable made my heart rate increase. He hardly knows us, yet he's being so sweet. It's something incredibly foreign to me, but I could get used to it.

"Yeah, sounds like a plan. Come on baby girl, I'll get you some pancakes" I reply while smiling down at Nova, watching her face as she breaks out into an excited smile. Usually, we only eat pancakes on her birthday and she loves them, so seeing her little face light up makes me feel good.