Healed//l.h a.u

epilouge

Dear Blaze,

I'm sorry.

You are so beautiful, I have thought that since the moment I saw you outside my window that cold morning in October. You had these blue eyes that were swollen and held such resentment as you stared at the house you would call your home. I wanted to know more about you ever since that day your mother and mine thought that we should have bonded in your room. Little did they know I was hungover and you weren't one to take my sly remarks. We didn't start the way most romantic novels do but that's okay because you shouldn't create an idea of the plot just by the first chapter. And even if we did have our fights I'm still grateful that whoever is up there allowed me to have this time to fall in love with you.

I love you, Blaze. I've loved you since I was sixteen and I don't want you to think this is your fault because it's not.

I just can't do this anymore.

You were a hurricane and with that, I was intrigued. Your words used to be so sharp but behind the facade you wore, I could see how fragile you were. All I ever wanted was for you to be happy and not find that happiness at the end of the bottle or the sting you received when you dragged metal across your skin. The day you were a year clean was a day I can swear to you I was not sad once. You have come a long way, baby, and I'm so proud of you. Please, don't stop your recovery.

I need you stay strong for Noemi.

Words cannot describe the emotions that I felt the moment she came into this world. She is so beautiful and looks more like you everyday. We have created such a darling little girl and I need you to not give up on raising her because you believe you're incomplete without me. One day, when the time is right, tell Ni about me. Don't hold back, she needs to know the person her father was, even if I wasn't the best at times. I want her to know how I love her more than anything and I will always look after her, even if I'm not here anymore.

Tell Michael that I always accepted him, because loving boys instead of girls doesn't make him less of a person. Tell Calum that I'm so sorry for always putting my weight on him and that me being diagnosed with bipolar depression should not make him forgive me so easily. Tell Ashton I forgive him, even if he released to the media some of my deepest secrets in attempts to keep me away from you. Tell my mother that I love her and I'm not mad about her ignoring how my father treated me. Tell my father that I forgive him, because bruises do heal. Tell the fans that they did everything they could. They gave me a career that allowed me to impact the world with my music and that's all I ever wanted. And tell our babygirl that Daddy loves her and that he'll see her one day and that he's so sorry for missing her birthdays and other special days.

And to you, the girl who changed my life. The girl who stayed by me, shining light on my darkest days. The girl who accepted my flaws. The girl who made me want to be a better person. I am so sorry for all the pain I have caused. I'm sorry for the times I was unfaithful. I'm sorry for the nights I stumbled into our home drunk and screaming at you. I'm sorry for not taking my medication. And I'm sorry for leaving you.

I love you and that's never going to change.

And please, be the Mom I know you can be for our daughter. I know in the beginning it will be hard, but you have Rain, the boys and your family that love and support you. You will be wonderful, even if it's hard at times. Don't feel guilty about this, because the only fault is mine. I would of never been a good father and everyone knows that.

Please continue to love yourself and open up to those who want to help you.

I love you Blaze Nicole Winters and I am so sorry.

Goodbye Princess,

- Luke.

It was May 24th, 2016 where Blaze Hemmings found her husband, Luke Hemmings on the bathroom floor with this note in his hands.

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I actually cried writing this. I hope this letter answered all the questions you had.

thank you for reading!!!

CHECK OUT MY NEW LUKE FANFIC; SEASONS