Connor didn't want to leave this hug. He liked it way too much. He felt so safe and warm where he was right now.
"Connah. I'm so sorry you feel this way. You don't deserve this pain. And I hope I can help you somehow. You are allowed to love. And you are allowed to love yourself. You deserve to love yourself. You deserve to be happy. You are worthy of happiness. I hope you can find that someday. And I hope I can help you find that. Okay?" Troye finished his speech and Connor just wanted to hug him for days. Little did Troye know that Troye was basically the only human he saw anymore.
"Thank you Troye. For everything. We've barley been talking for a day and you've already been nicer than everyone at this school. Thank you."
"No problem Connah. How about this. Movie night and tumblr? I'll make my bed into a giant nest." Troye sounded excited as they walked down the street.
Connor chuckled. "Sure."
Once they made it to Troyes house they went up to his room straight away.
"So. What movie?" Troye asked Connor as Connor looked around Troyes room. Looking at his guitar and music collections.
"Whatever you like."
"How about you pick the movie while I go get some snacks and drinks?"
"Sure!"
Connor kept looking around the room. Once he got to the DVD's he looked through them. Mean Girls? Or Avengers?
Once Troye was back with the snacks he went and sat down next to Connor on the bed.
"So what did you pick for me?"
"I saw Avengers and Mean Girls? Which one?"
"Hmmm.... Mean Girls never gets old. How about that one?"
"Sure! I love that movie." Connor said. Troye got up and put the movie in and got it started and then sat back down on the bed a couple feet away from Connor. Their backs were towards the wall since the bed was pushed again the wall. On the other wall the TV was on top of Troyes dresser. Troye showed Connor his choices in blankets since he had many for this type of occasion where it was just necessary to have a nest of blankets. Connor found it cute that Troye loved this many blankets for a movie. But he quickly ignored those thoughts about his new friend.
About halfway through the movie Connor had realized that the two had migrated closer to each other and were about two inches away from holding hands. He felt his heartbeat speeding up as he tried to not concentrate that he was almost cuddling with Troye. He looked away from Troye and smiled to himself. He had not felt like this towards anyone before and he found It frightening almost. They had been talking for not even two days and he already felt this way towards Troye. What was he going to do? Connor brought his attention back to the movie before he got too wrapped up in what he was thinking. But he soon felt Troyes head on his shoulder. Has he fallen asleep? Connor thought. He looked over without moving too much and realized Troyes eyes were wide open and focused on the movie. What is happening? Is this him flirting? Is this just platonic? Should I make a move back? Connor felt himself almost shaking. Why was he worrying so much. This boy was actually being nice. And not the fake nice he got from most people at school or at home. He felt like this boy actually wanted to be friends with him. It was a weird feeling. A feeling he wasn't used to at all. And it was hard to trust that all this boy wanted was to be friends with him.
"I can practically feel you thinking Connor. Stop worrying. Is there something you want to talk about?" Troye sat up and rubbed Connors arm gently, trying to calm Connor down a bit. But what would Connor even say? I like you but I can't trust anyone and I've got all these thoughts but I don't know how to tell you about any of it. "You can tell me anything you need to Connor. I'm not here to judge in any way. I just really like hanging out with you and I want to help you. Okay?" How is this boy so perfect? How can he make me so calm and giddy at the same time?
"There's just a lot on my mind right now. But thank you. For being here for me. It really helps. It's just.... I know I already said some of this earlier but... I haven't been in the best headspace. And I do try to get out of it, but it just doesn't really ever go away. But thank you.. For trying to help. It's really nice to know someone cares in any way, cause usually people don't." And in that. Moment Connor felt Troye take his own hand in his. It made him feel so warm and cozy inside. How could a touch make him feel so safe? He wouldn't question it any more tonight. He didn't have the energy today. He rested his head in Troyes shoulder like Troye had done earlier. He felt Troye give his hand a reassuring squeeze. He smiled to himself while they finished the movie.
Here he was. Holding hands an practically cuddling with his new friend. Bundled up in blankets with snacks to his side. Watching a movie and having nothing else to worry about in this moment.
Once the movie ended neither boy moved. They just sat there, content with what was happening. Content that they would totally look like a couple to the outside world. But for right now. They didn't care. This is want they needed. What they wanted. And they would stay here as long as they want.
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DOUBLE UPDATE!!! Bet you didn't expect that! But yeah. I've been writing a lot recently. My parents are being stressful and I feel like I'm constantly going to burst into tears whenever they are talking to me. So when I get to go to bed(write fan fiction) it really helps my anxiety. But yeah.
Hope you enjoy. I can't wait for you guys to read the rest. I've got probably close to half the book done but in not sure how far I'm going to take this. So yeah.
Please vote and comment and share with your friends if you liked it. Holy cow I'm making it sound like a YouTube video.
But yeah that is it guys! Bye my lovelies!!!
Teeny out!
