Clandestine || J. Garoppolo

[35]

Billy and Sam's relationship becomes important later tbh

Ok so I had a dream that last night that Hazel was Terry Muldoon's (from public morals) daughter and she was killed but as she was dying she sent Logan a text telling him he was the best part of her life and that she loved him more than anything and it was so sad

Aaanyway sorry I didn't update I was busy

Kinda short btw

Enjoy
**************************************

"Billy, shut up!" Sam's voice giggled. Haz heard Billy laugh, then say,

"Night, Blondie."

"Night, Prince Charming."

There was a pause, and then the door creaked open slightly. Hazel listened carefully as Sam got into bed, and Billy came through Haz and Logan's room.

"You awake?"

"Yeah. G'night, Billy."

"Night, Haz."

He disappeared into the boys' room, and Hazel sighed deeply. The house was relatively quiet, except the occasional bellow of laughter from downstairs or the light snoring from the boys' room.

Logan's breathing was steady next to Haz, and she felt his chest fall and rise. She didn't know why she couldn't sleep; she just couldn't. All of the sudden, however, Logan's breathing stopped, and he gasped for air.

"Babe?" Haz asked softly. Logan bolted upright next to her; his skin was hot and flustered.

"H-Haz?" he choked out, looking around frantically. She put her hand to his arm.

"Hey, babe, I'm here. You alright?" she asked softly, squeezing his shoulder.

"I don't want to leave New England!" he said frantically, his voice shaking. "I don't want to leave! I love New England! I love you!"

"Woah, woah, Logan," she yawned, sitting up and stretching. "Back up. What's wrong?"

"I don't want to leave Boston! What if I get traded or don't make the team? I love you and I love us and I love what we have and I love you so much, Hazel!" he cried. "I love being here, and I love how everything is going and I love you! I love you! You're such an amazing person and I love you and I don't want to leave Boston! Boston has been my home for the past three years and I don't want you to leave and I don't want to leave! I don't want to leave Boston and I don't want to not be signed again and what if I don't make the team?" his voice shook. "What if I don't make it, Hazel? What's gonna become of us? What's gonna happen? Dammit, Hazel," he cried. "Dammit, Hazel! I love you so much. I love you so much. I don't want to leave. I don't want to leave. I love you. I love New England. I love the fans. I love it here," his voice shook. "I love it here."

"Babe, where's this coming from?" Haz murmured, brushing her thumb across his cheek.

"What if? I have no idea what gonna happen! I have no idea who's gonna beat me out! I have to go into it thinking I'm gonna be the best but what if? What if?" he repeated frantically, his body twitching nervously.

Tears were running down his face, and Hazel realized that this was the first time she had seen him cry. Her heart ached in her chest.

"Babe, where is this coming from?" she repeated, putting her hand to his chest.

"I'm....This is what happens, when I think about things too much. This is what happens," he repeated, his lower lip trembling.

"You were on Twitter, weren't you?" she sighed, having seen some negative tweets about Logan's performance last year as well.

"I'm sorry."

"Logan, you're twenty four years old," she sighed, rubbing her forehead. "You are twenty four. Normally you would be just out of college and just starting out in the world. You'd probably be living in some shitty apartment in New York or New Jersey, and you'd barely be making your way. You'd be working your ass off to make a buck. You are still a child, Logan. You might be a legal adult, but you are still a child."

"I'm sorry...."

"Baby, baby, shh," she sighed, bringing his head to her chest. "Don't apologize, baby. I love you, Logan. I love you. Please don't apologize."

"I don't want to leave, Haz. I don't want to leave."

"Logan...."

"I don't want to leave you! What will happen if I get traded? Or I get let go? Or I don't make the team? What happens to us, Hazel? You're here! You're here, Hazel!"

"Logan, don't worry about it baby. You've got to be positive, babe. Positive. You're gonna be fine, my love," she murmured, kissing his head.

"T-Thank you," he choked out, and she kissed his temple again.

"I love you, Logan. Now let's get some sleep, baby. You need to relax. Just breathe," Hazel soothed, pushing his chest lightly backwards.

He laid down, and Haz put her hand on his stomach. His breathing shook, and Haz brushed her thumb over his skin.

"I don't want to leave," he hiccuped. Hazel sighed again.

"Babe, I'm not leaving and you're not leaving. No one is leaving. It's you and me, Logan. You and me," she murmured, pressing her lips to his jaw.

"You and me?" he asked.

Logan's breathing calmed down slightly over the next couple minutes. Hazel remained wide awake, and it hurt her to see Logan like this.

Logan didn't want to leave New England because Hazel was here. Damn.

Hazel kissed his cheek again, and she brushed her thumb over his cheek. She sighed, and after a moment, whispered softly,

"You and me, no matter what."

-

Logan woke up again at about three in the morning the next morning. Hazel was sitting up next to him, reading glasses on her nose and her phone in her hand.

"Go back to bed, baby," she murmured softly, putting a hand to his chest. He sat up and rubbed his eyes. "How are you? Are you alright?"

"Yeah," he nodded. "I think so."

"Good, I'm glad," Haz smiled, folding her glasses and putting them on her bedside table.

She put her hand on Logan's thigh and leaned in to give him a long kiss. She brushed her thumb over his cheek.

"I'm so happy I have you," he whispered, his voice cracking slightly.

"And I'm happy I have you. I love you, baby. I love you."

"I love you, too."

Hazel curled up to Logan's side, and he put his arm around her. Their breathing coincided. After about ten minutes, they both fell asleep peacefully.