The Slightest Hope

Chapter 13

HARRY'S POV

My head pounded as I sat up. Much to my surprise, I was aggressively forced back down. My ears felt like they were filled with hot water and all my eyes saw were darkness.

"Friend?" Drew said, a hint a fright in his wavering voice. When I didn't respond, he dumped shockingly cold water on my head.

"Drew!" I sputtered. I shivered beneath the borrowed clothes I wore. It felt like I was buried in ice cubes. Luckily, my vision was beginning to adjust and I could detect the pink interior of Rose's bathroom. I tried to sit up, only to be shoved back again.

"Sorry, Harry. You are supposed to stay on your back with your feet el- elev- elevated." Drew stuttered, straining to get out the words. I heard him let out an angry huff but all I could see was the blurry outline of his round body.

"What happened?" I asked, even though I knew the answer.

"You fainted when I told you about Elizabeth. Then I carried you and put you in the bathtub so I could pour water on you." Drew mischievously giggled at the last sentence. I chuckled, but cringed at the word 'fainted'. It sounded so....girly. Like I had just seen a famous celebrity and I fainted. I cringed again.

"I left you some of Daddy's clothes on the counter if you think you can stand." Drew said sheepishly. It was obvious he didn't want to help me change. I didn't really want him to either.

"Nah, buddy. I got it. Go wait in Rose's room." I said, but in all honesty, I was unsure if I could stand at all.

I saw Drew's figure nod and waited for the confirming slam of the door before standing.

My knees were shaky and weak, but I managed, with the help of the counter, to hold myself up. I tugged the sopping wet shirt over my head. I lost my balance a few times, but leaned against the counter to remain stable. Getting off a soaked pair of jeans was the hard part. They clung to my skin as I tottered around the bathroom, trying to pull them off. Eventually, I defeated the challenge. The clothes lay in a wet pile of shame as I pulled on the fresh jeans and red button down flannel. They were soft on my skin, which I was grateful for.

When I opened the door, Drew sat on her bed, laptop screen illuminating his face. I walked over, carpet drying my wet feet, and took a gentle seat beside him.

"Tell me about Elizabeth." I demanded. I hadn't glanced at the computer screen yet, afraid of what I might see. Instead, I fiddled with the buttons on my shirt.

"It says that she is 33 now. Still living in the Norfolk area. Still listed as married to a Josh Styles. That's kinda weird. Shouldn't it be widowed?" Drew asked. When he saw the pained look on my face, he grabbed my hand.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to say that." Drew said, guilt oozing out of his voice. I knew he didn't know any better, but I simply nodded at his apology. There was a sizable lump in my throat, and I knew if I talked, I would cry.

"Wanna see a picture of her? She's really pretty." Drew asked in a whisper. I nodded again and he titled the screen towards me.

Drew was right. She was really pretty. Her hair was short now, but still the same bright blonde and her eyes were still the same deep blue. Not blue like Rose's, whose were bright like the sky on a summer day. Elizabeth's eyes were darker, like the sea.

I scrolled through pictures of her as Drew say beside me in silence. Suddenly, I stopped scrolling, pausing on a specific picture.

Elizabeth sat in an armchair, small wrinkles beside her eyes from smiling. She faced the camera and her chin rested on top of an infant boy's head. The boy had the same blonde hair and same bright smile as Elizabeth. What caught my attention were his eyes. Chocolate brown. I had seen those eyes before, just belonging to someone else. Josh. I scrolled through more pictures of them. Elizabeth and the boy laughing. Elizabeth and the boy in the park. Elizabeth and the boy eating birthday cake. The caption read ' Happy second birthday, Blake!".

Blake was my nephew. I could see a few similarities between us, but not many. We had the same structured jaw and the same lips. Blake was Josh's kid. And that's why I needed to meet him.

"Harry, maybe you should send her an email. You could see him and her. You know, have a little family reunion." Drew said, snapping me from my thoughts. That angered me and I broke.

"I can't go down there! I can't just ignore her email for a year and then respond like its no big deal! Look at them smiling! They don't need me! If I went down there, it would just screw up there lives! They are happy without me! Look! I would only make things worse! They don't need me!" I screamed, shoving the laptop away from me. I hadn't meant to take my anger out on Drew, but I didn't care.

Drew said nothing. He merely pulled the laptop towards him, clicked a few buttons and then pushed towards me. I heard the mattress springs squeak as he sat up. He walked towards the door, uneven footsteps making me even madder and I was tempted to push him down. And right before he left, I heard a slight sniffle. Then he closed door.

That sniffle brought me back to my senses. I shuddered, disgusted with myself. I just destroyed the self esteem of a mentally handicapped boy. I was no better than the bullies that caused him to attempt suicide. I hugged my knees to my chest as I let out heart wrenched sobs. My chest heaved and I sobbed hard for a long time. I wrapped my arms around myself as though if I let go, I would shatter into a million pieces. My sobs began to cease, but I sat in an broken state, afraid to confront Drew.

I gently pulled the laptop towards me, curious of what he had done.

The laptop screen showed the login to Gmail. I gently grazed the keys with my fingertips, unsure if I really wanted to do this. Before I could change my mind, I quickly logged in.

There were no new emails, since I had not been around electronics in awhile. The last email was from Elizabeth and I opened it, skimming the paragraph quietly. Sorry, nephew, dead, love, miss, and visit were all words that appeared numerous times. I scanned the familiar words one last time before clicking on the compose button.

I sat in silence for a long period, the small black line blinking in anticipation of my awaited words. I thought of what to say, afraid I would say to much or not enough. I felt a slight tingle in my index and then I just typed. My feelings that I had been holding back poured onto the page as I typed furiously.

I leaned back, satisfied as I read my work.

"Elizabeth,

I'm sorry for never getting back to you. Times have been tough and honestly, I was scared. I didn't want to come back and face Josh's death. And I'm sorry. I know you needed me to help you with Blake and money. It was selfish of me to leave. I can never repay you for these past years that you have been living in mourning, all while taking care of a child by yourself. I'm living with a family now, a brother and a sister. The brother, Drew, is mentally handicapped but it doesn't matter. He is really smart, probably smarter than me. He would have been smart enough to know better than to leave you. The sister, Rose, is something else. She is smart and beautiful and funny and overall just perfectly imperfect. Being with them has made me realize that I need you in my life. I can't just never speak to you again. If you and Blake ever want to come visit, I live in New York, New York in a small apartment complex called Oakland Heights. Please drop by if you get the urge. And again I'm sorry. I love you.

Much apologies and love,

Harry"

DREW'S POV

My door cried open, per usual, and I didn't have to look up to know Harry stood at the foot of my bed.

"Thank you." He whispered, obviously ashamed of his actions. I said nothing, merely scooted over on the bed. He walked over, footsteps heavy on the wood. I felt him hesitate before crawling into bed beside me. His shoulder pressed into me and his hand wandered until it found mine. He squeezed it and I could feel his warm tears dripping on my shoulder.

"I'm sorry." He whispered.

I said nothing, only squeezing his hand back as an acceptance of his apology. Tears fell harder onto my shoulder as he snuggled into my back.

"I love you, Drew." Harry said. His voice was harsh against his tears. He was trying not to sob.

"I love you more, friend." I whispered.