The Secret Life of Poot Lovato

Madison the Fatty

"There's always someone out there who'll be there for you.

There is always someone out there who'll care for you.
There's always someone out there who'll be true, true, true.
Hold on, hold on, be strong."

Demi's rendition of Maria Haukaas Storeng's "Hold On Be Strong" at her school's talent show led her to a resounding victory. She knew she had to become a professional singer. She dropped out of school and moved to Hollywood from New Mexico to seek success.

And years later, at the end of 2014, Demi Lovato was a global hitmaker with four Gold-certified albums to her name and a successful world tour. After going through depression, bulimia, and two or three flop singles, Demi was finally on top, confident and ready to keep inspiring the rest of the world.

But what about Poot? We left her in 2008. She killed Niall, Demi's boyfriend, and no one knew she existed. Rumor has it that Poot left the country after her terrible murder to take part in the nuclear experiments in Russia. Others say she ran a brothel in Bangkok, or that she opened an illegal medical clinic in Romania. Some even reported seeing Poot in the rainforest in Indonesia, living with the local cannibal peoples. We don't know anything for sure. All we know is that, in the summer of 2014, someone called Poot Lovato entered the United States with a student visa, married and divorced a mysteriously-deceased man called Austin Mahone within 36 hours, obtained the US citizenship, and went living in a wealthy neighborhood in suburban Los Angeles.

I went there personally and interviewed Poot's neighbors to find out more about her. It seems like they didn't know much about her either. Here is what they said.

Maureen: "She's one bizarre-looking fellow. She looks a lot like that one singer, Danny Lavato, but her smile is different... like, eerie. Doesn't go out much, and only at night."

Barackisha: "Guuurl, she enjoys some thique blaque dique from time to time. You know, she invites men over. Whoever gets into that house never comes out. I think she eats 'em, no wonder she so thicc."

Betsy Sue: "Uh ya know, I ain't never talked to that creepy lady, she gives me murderer vibes. I gots a family reunion comin' up and dyin' would be a bummer. Lordamercy!"

Ever since Poot moved to America, strange things have been happening to Demi. One night, she was feeling sick, so she posted a message on Twitter to her fans.

"@ddlovato: I feel horrible to say that tonight's LA concert is canceled... I'm feeling too sick, hope you forgive me! ):"

But to the surprise of her fans who went to the venue anyway, Demi was there. More energetic than ever. No sign of sickness or tiredness. Everyone thought Demi was just trolling, and enjoyed the show. The show was well-received by the press, which gave it raving reviews. But the vocals and the stage presence weren't the only thing that made the news after the concert.

Madison, a long-time Lovatic, couldn't wait to talk to Demi face to face during the meet and greet. The $350 ticket was all worth it, she thought. How wrong she was! As she said hi, Demi replied with "fat". Madison, an overweight girl, initially shook it off, thinking she might've misheard. She continued talking to Demi about how much she was her idol and life saver. "You'll die soon enough, fatty." Madison couldn't believe it. Demi had just told her the meanest thing ever! While the poor girl was still in shock, Demi approached Madison's ear with her lips and whispered: "Obesity." Madison started crying, she had never felt so much in pain before. As if it wasn't enough, Demi said: "Stop it. Stop it, now!" Then, the singer put her hand into the crying girl's panties, ripped them, and flicked her vagina. The photographer took the picture and, as Madison headed out of the meet and greet section, Demi spoke whale to her.

After seeing Madison's story all over the internet, Demi direct messaged the girl on Twitter asking her to remove the exposé with a good old "delete it fat". But the fat didn't delete it.

Outraged by this, the obese community of the world started asking Demi to apologize, but all she'd do was snapchat offensive selfies to them. In one, Demi can be seen laying on her bed, pretending to be asleep, with the writing "dreaming of sleeping with whales aka u" all over it. Another one features a surprised Demi with "holy shit did you get fatter lmao" written on it. And finally, tired of the fatties annoying her, she sent a snapchat of her smiling happily, with the writing "ur fucking fat don't snapchat me again" over it.

Then, after three days, Demi tweeted that she had recovered from her sickness. Several interviewers started asking her why she'd been fat shaming and speaking whale, and she denied everything, including the vajayjay flicking. What the hell was happening?