The Secret Life of Poot Lovato

Monster in the Attic

"I'm here in New York to interview random people about their thoughts on the formerly successful singer-songwriter Demi Lovato. Let's start. So, what do you think of Demi?"

"I really don't care."

"Poor Demi! Let's ask someone else... Hello random people, do you consider yourselves Lovatics?"

"That's definitely something that we're not."

"Embarrassing. Have you heard of Demi before?"

"I'm confident I haven't... Hold up, is she one of those Hollywood stars? You know, I usually don't forget about my teenage idols, but Demi... never heard of her."

"Wow, it seems like Demi has become less relevant than Azealia Banks," the reporter concluded. "And now let's see what the general public thinks about the current number one sensation, Selena Gomez."

Demi turned off the TV, and an evil smirk formed on her face. "How regrettable of them." She turned on her computer and stared at the file containing her duet with Adele, that would have surely sent her to number one effortlessly. She was about to upload it to iTunes as a surprise release, when suddenly... SBAM! Someone smashed her laptop on her head and ran away.

When she regained consciousness, Demi looked around her house, still confused, and noticed a small ladder leading up to her attic. The tiny door was open. This could only mean one thing: "THAAAAAAAAAT BIIIIIIIIITCH!" Demi's neighborhood was evacuated once again.

A few minutes later, Poot was ready to invade Jessie J's house. The good sis allegedly came out as straight the day after she had a sexual relationship with Poot, and this could be no coincidence. Incited by Demi, Poot had decided to take revenge on the heterosexual icon for deceiving her feelings like that.

Poot didn't even knock on Jessie's door. She broke it down with a kick and headed to Jessie's room. She could here strange noises coming from there. They went like "uhh, ohh, I can do it like a dude bish"... Poot approached quietly, and saw something her eyes didn't want to see. She didn't even have the time to elaborate. She felt hurt, more than when Jessie announced she liked thique blaque dique on national TV. That filthy liar was still into the V, just not Poot's...

Poot ran to Demi's house, where she found her sister screaming harder than Jessie J having a lesbian orgasm. "I DID NOT KIDNAP ADELE, DRUG HER AND FORCE HER TO RECORD A DUET WITH ME JUST TO SEE THAT BITCH DESTROY MY LAPTOP AND RUIN MY ONLY CHANCE FOR SUCCESS! I'M GONNA FIND HER AND KILL HER!!!" She was furious. Poot could clearly see smoke coming out of her ears and nostrils. After a few minutes, when she had run out of breath, she fell flat on the floor and stone cold.

Poot reanimated her sister using her hallucinogenic mushrooms, and said, with a serious look on her face: "Demi, I think we're dealing with the same bitch... We used to be against eachother, but now it's time for us to join our forces and defeat the actually evil sister."

"Derp. Derp Lovato," Demi said, blank faced. "She should've stayed locked in the attic."

"Let's go flick her vagina for the rest of her days," Poot suggested.