The Secret Life of Poot Lovato

Straight to the J

Poot was enjoying her vacation in Florida... Until, at one point, there she was. Jessie J. The girl who fucked her and then went around saying that she was straight and liked thique blaque dique. Lying on the beach, surrounded by hot men of color. She was touching one of them's abs, praising one's pearly white smile, and staring at another one's crotch. A true heterosexual icon, it seemed. But Poot knew the truth, and she wanted Jessica to pay for betraying her like that. You just don't fuck up with Poot if you truly care about your vagina!

Poot decided to keep calm and spy on Jessie J from afar, so that she wouldn't tell someone was planning to flick her vagina. She noticed that she went to a nice German restaurant every night, ordered huge sausages, and ate them in a sexy way so that the male waiters would hit on her. Then, after dinner, she went to strictly heterosexual clubs to have fun with penis-supplied humans.

"I'm gonna make her miss her bisexual days," Poot said. "She's gonna want me back!"

Poot went to the German restaurant and posed as a waitress. "Gute Nacht, Frau!" she said to Jessica. "Do you want to try out our vagina-shaped steak? It's delicious! Oh, and tonight's dessert comes from Italy: a boob-shaped delicacy called cassatina siciliana. Highly recommended, also because we're out of sausages tonight."

Jessica was blatantly sweating. She was trying hard to repress her lesbian thoughts, but she really couldn't. "I guess I'll try out these new specialties," she finally said.

When she got her female genitals-shaped delicacies, she had an inner orgasm. She couldn't take it, so she went STRAIGHT to the restroom. There, Poot was waiting for her, without her waitress uniform.

"Well, hello, Jessica," she said.

"Pootrida Devilonne Lovato! What are you doing here?!" Jessie said, shocked.

"I'm just here for my bi-annual German dinner, and you?"

"I'm straight-ening my hair."

Poot approached her. "Oh you are? I think you look good with curly hair." Then, she whispered in her ear: "Or even better, when you shave your head and do me like a dude. Ahh, I miss those times."

Jessie was clearly sweating hard now. She spread her legs and screamed: "FLICK IT, FLICK IT WITH ALL OF YOUR POWER, POOTRIDA DEVILONNE LOVATO!"

Poot had already had her revenge, but it wasn't enough. So she threw Jessica into the toilet and flushed, letting her follow the same destiny as her career. "Straight to the sewer, bitch!" Poot said satisfied.

With no Justin, no Selena and no Jessica—basically, no one to care about or take revenge on—Poot was starting to feel bored. She didn't want to be evil anymore, especially when the world saw her as a heroine. She really just wanted to do something good and useful for the humankind. So, she flew to the poor rural villages in Moldova, where she taught the local populations everything about haute couture and luxury life. Soon enough, everyone in Moldova was wearing Chanel and Prada while working in the country, and driving BMW and Lamborghini tractors.

Another day, another slay for our girl. But Pootrida still felt lonely and unloved, and this made her utterly depressed, until one day...