"Thomas, I better not tell you that right now.... or never." With that my hope comes crashing down and got broken into little pieces. I'm ready to face whatever the pain or the joy it brings. I'm ready to give it my all or stop what I'm doing. She's giving me mixed signals that I don't even understand. One moment she's this clingy type and then the sensitive one that keeps reminding me that she's a ghost and we cannot be together. But for what I know Love comes in any type of being. Love is love. The next thing I know my smile turned into a frown and my mood just changed. For the hopeful to the defeated and to the angry Thomas the transition happened on a great speed.
"I can't understand you Ara, you are too complicated." I stood up frustrated. Pulling the strands of my hair not caring if I hurt myself. I'm beyond furious.
"Thomas naman eh, you know what I feel! You know it! But we can't! There's a fine line between being a human being and a ghost!" We were shouting back and forth. I was about to say something when I realized what she said. Stupid Thomas! How can you not see it? I paused for a bit. Being more careful with what should I say.
"We can Ara." I whispered almost inaudible
"What?" She angrily asked
"We can Ara." I said louder. But she gave up without even fighting back.
"The first time I saw you I knew there's something else. But now I know what is it. Iniba mo ang ikot ng mundo ko. And from that time on, my world revolves in you. Ikaw ung inaakala kong nakakatakot nung una, pero I learned how to love you. Ikaw, ikaw ang nagbigay ng saysay sa buhay kong walang kwenta. I can easily give up before you came. Problems easily get into me. But when you came I found my own reason to fight. You are my star in the darkest of the night. You are the one I want to be with until I die. Ikaw ung gusto ko. At ibibigay ko ang lahat para lang sayo. You are the one for me. If I could change my fate I'll choose to live in your time. I'll take care of you, I'll be with you, I'll love you until the last of my breath. I'll choose you. And today I decided to fight for you. Today I choose you. Today from this day on I'll be right beside. Because today I chose to love you." I was breathless at the time I ended my emotional speech. Hindi maipinta ang kanyang mukhang. My heart beats faster than usual. There are many more thing I'd like to say to her. But I can't put into words this feelings I felt for her, how I love her. I want her to choose me to. I want her to fight for me. I want to hear those three words from her. I want her to love me.
"Hindi mo ba naiintindihan Thomas. A month ago you're the normal person, the person who spend his time for himself who doesn't do anything unusual. You are the Thomas Torres before me. And you will always be once I'm gone. I can't choose you even though I want to. I want to choose you but I can't. Because I am the ghost Ara and you are the human Thomas. This feeling is wrong. I don't even know why I feel this. Hindi ko alam kung ano to. Kung bakit ko to nararamdaman. From that day onwards I felt life. Nung dumating ka. Naramdaman ko ang sakit, ang saya at ang pagmamahal. And I should feel anything like that Because I'm a ghost! And ghost should only scare away people. Not make people fall. I won't lie. When I found you I also found my reason to fight. But I can't fight for you. And I won't. I will only fight for you if there's a reason. But there's nothing. Wala, walang dahilan para ipaglaban kita. Kasi sa huli ghost ako at human ka. Sa huli I can't give you your dream future. I can't give you a future. We don't have an happy ending because one way or another I'll get to cross and leave you. And if I just found you in my lifetime. I will choose you. I'll be right beside you. I will fight for you. And I will love you. If we were just the Ara and Thomas 18 years ago." She whispered the last sentence in her reply. I fully understand what she means. And what she said is still appreiative. Now I know if we'll be given a chance will choose each other. But I don't know whats wrong with myself. I simly brole down and cried. Is it the pain? Or the happiness? Maybe the confusion.
I felt her move. she kneeled beside me. She rubbed my back slowly and the assurance was the best thing in the situation. I know she cares.I know she loves me. She's just too afraid to show it, to admit it, to accept it. I was too caught up with her admitting. I didn't even think about her. Her goals in this existance and her own being.
"Hey. Wag ka nang malungkot. Maybe this weird feeling is because we have a relationship back them. We maybe related with each other. Maybe by blood? Who knows."She smiled at me. I was about to smile back at her when I rembered something.
"Wait! You called my grandfather Pa." I was frozen with what I just said.
"What do you mean?" She asked really clueless. And for a split second she realized what just hat means.
"I can't possibly be your mother."
That's wrap! hahahahha! salamat sa pagtanggap muli sakin! Akala ko wla na talagang may pakialam! salamat! Continue niyo lang yan dahil sa mga susunod na kabanata hahabaan ko na para di bitin ahhahaha.
BINABASA MO ANG
Dorm 188 (Thomara fanfic)
Fanfiction"She smiled, lived, she fell in love, she breathe and she died in this exact place, in this exact spot. He smiled, once lived, he fell in love and he was left devastated in this exact place, in this exact room." After 18 years she fell in love once...
