A.N.O.R.E.X.I.A [BxB]

Eleven.

 Dear Jack,

                That letter from you felt really strange to read. You described the events just how I remember them, only now I seem to see the memories with even more clarity.

 I’m sorry if my kissing you was too abrupt or forward. I didn’t mean to do anything that may ‘harm’ you, if that’s the right word. In fact, I wanted to do the exact opposite; I wanted to maybe fix you in some way. You just sounded so damaged, and I couldn’t stand to hear how much of an outsider you felt. Sometimes I feel a little ostracised- possibly due to my hidden sexuality- but I still always have my friends. As fake as they may be…

 I think that’s why I’m such good friends with Thea. She’s probably the least fake person in the world, definitely the least fake person I know. Apart from you, I suppose, but I haven’t known you for long enough to really judge you just yet. Anyway, the reason Thea didn’t react when she saw us kiss is because she knows that I’m gay. She was the first and only person I ever told when I figured it out, and I informed her as soon as I myself knew. The weird thing about my relationship with Thea is that we can kiss without it meaning anything. Like, if we’re hanging out and laughing and our heads get close together, we can kiss in a friendly way. I know that sometimes girls who are best friends can peck each other on the lips, but I’ve never heard of a boy and girl being able to do that. I mean, with Thea it’s not always just a peck. But she’s always known and respected that I like boys.

 I think one of the weirdest things I read in one of your letters was that you knew I was gay before we had even spoken in person. I had to inform Thea, my oldest friend, of my sexuality, and none of my friends or family even have a clue. You must really notice a lot about a person as you watch them, Jack. I find that very interesting.

 By the way, I think we need to find a new way of slipping each other these letters. People were asking me what you posted in my locker at school; we need a more discreet method.

 Incidentally, I was wondering if you wanted to hang out after school tomorrow- the day you’ll receive this letter. It would be nice to talk face to face.

 Let me know.

                Love,
                Toby.