Wish I wasn't so shy

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It was weird; I'm starting to have dreams about my baby. Most of the time it's a girl, but I'll get one about a boy every now and then. I don't plan on telling my parents until I'm able to get an ultrasound.

My parents have been very accepting towards Julian. I'm sure in the three days he's been here, my dad gave him some big talk while I was napping or out with my mom, but even then Julian didn't seem to mind. He was planning on leaving tomorrow because they had a gig over the weekend and he needed to get back in time to practice. I felt it was necessary for me to stay but I wanted so badly to be back to New York.

I turned to my side, looking at Julian sleeping. It's cute the way his hair is messy in the mornings. I desperately needed to pee, but I didn't want to wake him up. Then again, I'm pregnant and it's now or never if I don't get up to piss. I slickly climbed off the bed and rushed to the bathroom, feeling instant relief. When I went back, Julian had a pose going on. His elbow was supporting his head as he had his fist against the side of his cheek, with one knee bent and the other leg out straight, lifting the blanket up like a tent.

"You are such a dork." I giggled, bouncing on to the bed.
"I may be a dork, but you're still with me."
"Dorks always get the girls", I admitted. He agreed, cuddling my waist and putting his face in the crook of my neck. His lashes lashed against my jawline.

"What was your dream this time?" He asked, knowing that I've been getting these dreams routinely.
"You singing to her while she was crying." It brought joy to me just thinking about it.
"That's cute." He smiled.
"I want to go back home with you." I pouted. He kissed me, telling me not to frown. "I wanna be with you too baby, but spend as much time as you need with your family."
"I've had enough of my family. Yes, I miss my brother with all my heart, but being back home won't help. And I don't want them to notice me having to pee all the time, having a huge appetite, and throwing up. My mom was pregnant at 19 and she was pregnant two more times after that, she would be able to tell in a second."
"Then come home." It almost sounded like a plead.
"Maybe I will."

And the next day, home we went. My parents knew I was going to ask them and they completely understood. Although I felt bad, I was itching to go back home and see everyone and be with Julian in private. We left that morning, after getting my things together and having breakfast. Andy was sad to see us leave so soon. Him and Julian had spent some time together and my dad also shared an afternoon with him, in which they bonded over many thing. He was encouraged by the fact that Julian wanted to pursue music as a career because that was always something my dad wanted, even my brother. They both didn't make it big, but my dad played in a band and Jesse was becoming a regular at a bar's open mic. That is until the night he died coming back from one. My father gave him advice and such when it came to gigs and told him to push through with music. My mum didn't have nearly as much encounters with Julian, she stayed in bed a lot, but when she did of course it involved embarrassing childhood stories and pictures.

On the car ride home, Julian told me that in the three days spent at my parents', he felt more at home then he did when he was younger. I was just glad it all worked out, telling my parents about my child would be easy now that they approve of Julian.

It took about 2 hours to get back home. I spent most of the time sleeping because being in that car too long made me sick. And then of course there was the traffic. That's why the minute we got home, I nearly cried tears of joy.

"Oh my comfy bed...my warm blankets..my beautiful couch", I exaggerated. I ran into my room, falling back on my bed. Julian joined me, wrestling me around. He sat on my thighs, being extra careful as he pinned my arms down. I giggled, using all the strength I had to break free.

As I begged for mercy he let go, bending down to give me a big kiss. I broke the kiss, lifting his head up. I wanted to take some time to look at him. I pulled his hair out of his face, staring into his constantly tired-looking eyes.

He had a small smirk and his bottom lip was between his teeth. He knew what he wanted and I wanted it just as bad.

• • •

My head rose up and down with the breathing of Julian's chest. His fingers glided up and down my back, making me shiver. He kissed the top of my head, whispering that he loved me. I smiled, looking up at him so now my chin was on his bare chest.

"I'm hungry", I said. Chuckling, he asked me what I wanted.
"Mac'n'cheese. Or maybe chips soaked in chili. I don't know." I shrugged my shoulders.
"Well how about we get you those chips and you can snack on that while I'm at practice and then after we can get mac'n'cheese."
"Oh that's right, you have practice. Yeah okay. But who knows...about." I looked down quickly, trying to motion to my stomach.

"Just Albert", he said.
"Yeah. I told Nick too."
"Do you want to tell the other guys?"
"I don't know...do you?"
He shrugged, "Only if you do."
"Can we wait a little?" I bit my lip, embarrassed that I didn't want to tell anyone, but I had no reason to be.
"That's totally fine baby." He kissed me again and then we got ready to head to the practice place.

Once I got my chips and was ready to go, we got to the warehouse in no time. I missed this place, it's felt like ages since I've been here.

"Are my eyes deceiving me", Fab exclaimed when he saw me.
"They are not Mr. Moretti." He ran to me, roughly embracing me and takling me on to the couch.
"Fab be careful", Albert hissed. Julian glanced at him as a thank you gesture. Fab, who only payed little attention to the shared glances between Julian, Albert and myself, went back to his drum kit. Shortly after, Nikolai arrived. The minute he walked in we all knew he got laid or something. He rarely came to practice with an adorable little smile on his face.

"Who did you bang last night", Julian smirked.
"I didn't bang anyone. I just ran into an old friend." He blushed. But the guys left it at that, quickly filling it in with complaints about Nick being late. And just like that, Nick rushed in as if that was his queue. He apologised, the guys grunting it off.

They went through their usual set list, going over songs that need work. Two other songs were added, In Her Prime and Alone, Together, which were the main focus of the practice. Unfortunately, Amanda and Fiona didn't come by because they were busy, so I was sat alone on the couch.

I noticed Julian lighting a cigarette, smoking a puff, but quickly putting it out. "Sorry", he said into the mic. I waved it off, but suddenly craved a cigarette, I haven't had one in ages. "I wish I could have one", I whined.

"You can bum one off of me", Fab offered.
"No...I'm trying to quit", I said.
"Ha, good luck." Then he lit one up. I tried not to breath any of it in, only opening my mouth when I ran out of breathe from holding it. At some point, I had excuse myself. The minute I walked out I puke. The smell was not compatible with my sensitive stomach. I walked back in, quickly running into the bathroom to wash up then sat back on the couch like nothing happened.

I survived through the practice. Nikolai invited us to tag along to a trip to the bar. I could tell Julian wanted to go, so I told him I was fine with getting mac'n'cheese on my own.
"Maya, you sure? I'll stay with you if you want me to." He put on his puppy eyes, making him irresistible.
"I'm good, don't stay out too late got it?" I pointed a stern finger at him.
"Sure thing darling. Thanks." He gave me the car keys and pecked my lips. I said good bye to the rest of the guys, at which point Albert whispered congratulations in my ear. I smiled at him, walking to the car and getting in to the driver's seat.

I got home, changimg into sweatpants and one of Julian's shirts he had lying around my apartment. Once I got my cheesy heaven prepared, I settled down on the couch. They were showing The Sixth Sense on TV, so I watched that. Right after I finished my food(which consisted of a little more junk food in between) I knocked out on the couch.

AN: Filler chapter but much more to come