the photographer [c.h.]

eight

"Flight 316 to Paris, now boarding." The monotone voice over the speaker said.

Calum, Ashton, Leah and I got up from our seats and slowly made our way to the terminal. The lady scanned our tickets and I sighed, preparing myself for the long flight. As we walked through the tube and onto the plane, I noticed that Ashton and Leah had jumped in front of us, taking their seats. I was supposed to sit with Leah. I frowned and Calum tugged my sleeve, motioning towards the two seats to my left. We sat down and I put my backpack under the seat in front of me, stretching my legs out. My leg shook in it's place out of nervousness and I bit my lip, glancing out the window.

"Are you scared?" Calum asked quietly with a small smile on his face and I nodded.

"I hate planes." I breathed out as they locked the doors shut. "I don't know how you do it every other day."

"Eh, I got used to it." He shrugged and I nodded, clutching the arm rests when it went down the runway.

Calum grabbed my hand and interlocked our fingers when the plane took off. He winced as I squeezed his hand and I mumbled a 'sorry', loosening my grip. The plane finally steadied in the air and I took a deep breath, slightly calming down. Calum gave me a reassuring smile and I offered a weak one, watching him pull his phone out. He handed me an earbud and I put it in my ear, hearing All Time Low playing. I leaned my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes, exhaustion coursing through me. The last few days have been so tiring and I have barely gotten any sleep.

"How old is Sophie?" Calum whispered and I looked up at him.

"Almost five." I mumbled.

"She looks a lot like you." He smiled and I nodded. "It's weird because Leah said your dad adopted her."

"Um, yeah." I stumbled over my words and he furrowed his dark eyebrows.

I ignored his stare and looked out the window as we passed through the clouds and Leah turned around. She gave me a smile and I just kept my gaze out the window. I honestly didn't feel like talking to anyone right now. When I get sad, I shut myself down. I pulled my hand from Calum's grip and put it in my hoodie pocket, tugging my knees to my chest. I heard Calum sigh and I ignored it, momentarily closing my eyes.

"You look like you need a drink."

Leah turned around to me and I just shook my head. I haven't drank since Sophie was born and I don't want to fall into old habits. After a minute, I stood up and stepped across Calum's legs, making my way to the bathroom. I locked the door behind me and braced myself against the sink, taking deep breaths. After a couple minutes, I flushed the toilet so people would think I went to the bathroom. I walked out and sat back down, buckling my seatbelt. This is going to be a long flight.

~~~~~~~~

"Are you okay?" Calum asked as we stood at baggage claim.

"I'm fine." I muttered, reaching for my black duffel bag.

I slung it over my shoulder and went to find Leah. She offered a smile and I weakly returned one, looking down at the ground. Calum and Ashton soon met up with us and we walked out to the car that was waiting for us. We all climbed in, escaping the fans, and I let out a breath, leaning back in the seat. I leaned my head on Leah's shoulder and she patted my knee.

"Do you wanna get dinner later?" Calum asked quietly and I looked over at him.

"Maybe."

I avoided his stare and Leah quirked an eyebrow at me. We finally got to the hotel and filed into the lobby, immediately seeing the other boys and Annie. Annie ran up and pulled Leah and I into a hug. I followed Leah up to our room and put my bag down. I changed into a pair of shorts and long sleeve t-shirt, pulling my hair up. I tied my tennis shoes and grabbed my phone before telling Leah bye.

I went to the elevator and clicked the button to go to the main floor. Following the signs, I found the hotel gym and I put my key in, pushing my way inside. The room was empty so I climbed onto the treadmill, starting out walking. I increased the speed to 5.0 and started running to the beat of Fall Out Boy in my headphones. Someone got on the treadmill next to me and I turned my head to see a shirtless Ashton. I offered a small smile as he waved and continued on my run. Ashton said something so I pulled out my earbud.

"What?" I asked, slightly turning to look at him.

"You know, Calum really likes you." Ashton said and I nodded. "Like a lot."

"I know." I said quietly and Ashton frowned a little.

"Are you just leading him on?" Ashton blurted out, making me slow down. "Because he may seem like a super tough dude, but when it comes to dating, he's clueless."

"Why would I do that?" I furrowed my eyebrows, stopping the treadmill.

"He was just upset that you were being so distant and stuff. I don't know, but he thinks that you still hate him." Ashton explained and I sighed.

"I just have a lot going on, Ashton, you know that." I trailed off and he stopped his treadmill too.

"I know." Ashton gave me a small smile and we both started walking to the elevator. "How are you holding up?" He asked, pressing the button and I shrugged.

"I'll be okay." I faked a smile, knowing that it was a lie. We got into the elevator and I leaned against the wall, yawning. I have barely slept or eaten and the short run made me tired.

"You okay, Katie?" Ashton asked as we got out of the elevator and I saw small black dots in my line of vision. "Katie?"

Before I knew it, I blacked out and hit the floor.