Angel Wings

Chapter 9.2

Evabelle sat in one of the many window seats of the library, surrounded by many of her favorite books.  Sometimes this was the only way she could cope with anxiety.  At that moment, however, they seemed to be making things worse.  The books lay open at random pages, but she wasn't looking at any of them.  Her head was in her hands, her knees curled up to her chest.

"What kind of heroine am I?"  Her voice shook.  "I'm not one at all, really.  I could never be in Gryffindor or Dauntless.  Heroes are brave."

"What would you be then?"

Evabelle's head snapped up, just as Lucis stepped out from behind a bookcase.  "Oh, Lucis, It's nothing, nothing important." Evabelle put her legs down to hang over the bench and stared at her feet.

Lucis picked up one of the open books and sat beside her.  "What kind of heroine are you, then?"

Evabelle glanced up at the book in Lucis's hands; Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone.  She shook her head.  "If I were ever sorted into a house at Hogwarts or to choose a faction, the only ones I would be good for would be Hufflepuff or Amity.

Lucis gazed at Evabelle.  "What's wrong with being kind and wanting peace?"

Evabelle blinked; surprised that he knew what she was talking about.  "You really have read a lot of books haven't you?"

Lucis smiled.  "I told you I've read both human and Anahalian literature."

"You know we've already had this discussion on bravery."

"Yes, and we will continue to have it until it needs be."

Evabelle sighed and turned away from him.  "Did you hear about what happened today, in the training room?"

"I heard that you ran out and nobody's quite sure why.  Calandra said something about putting one of her famous illusionist spells on you three, and also she mentioned something about a fovodroga so that you would see someone you feared, or some sort of enemy."  Lucis replied.

Evabelle felt her hands shaking again.  "I didn't see an enemy.  I saw Kai."  She whispered.

Lucis was quiet for a moment.  Evabelle knew that he had heard her.

"A vampire is a terrifying thing."  He said.  "It is rumored that they were one of the beings used to create an Annihilator."  He paused for a moment and looked at her.  "But you seeing him, I don't think has anything to do with Kai as a person, but with you.  Your guilt.  You may be afraid of him, but I am going to tell you this now that there are many different kinds of fear and different ways of reacting to them.  You just need to choose the right one."

"What's the right one?"  Evabelle exclaimed.  "What's the right way to react to my fears?  I'm a coward!  Everything terrifies me, Lucis, and I hate it!"  She felt the sting behind her eyes again.

It was slow and deliberate, the way Lucis took her hand and held it within both of his.  "You have a chance to be the bravest of us all Evabelle, because you are scared.  It's the times when we are most afraid that we get the chance to show the most courage.  When our hearts are beating out of our chests and we feel as though we cannot move, that is the moment where we must choose what action we are going to take.  Fight or flight is a choice and one only you can make."

Evabelle squeezed his hand taking comfort in their warmth and security that lay within his fingers, but did he really believe that she could just choose to be brave.  Bravery was an attribute, something that was already there.  It wasn't made over time, not really.

Lucis rose to his feet with her hand still in his.  "Come on, I think it is time we start your magic lessons."

Evabelle blinked up at him.  "Right now?"