Covert Affairs

Have a Normal Fucking Birthday

Waking up this morning I immediately felt off, which is honestly so ridiculous all things considered. It was my 16th birthday and really the only thing I was looking forward to was getting my driver's license. We take private driver's Ed classes here at Gallagher Academy and we get someone to come onto campus to deliver the test so we don't actually have to go into the DMV. It's a pretty sweet gig actually.

Moving on to the point of the matter, I really don't understand why I've never liked my birthday. I don't particularly enjoy the thought of aging. And while, yes, I am a bit young to be having these thoughts I do believe it's something everyone thinks about often. Also, birthdays are so awkward to me. For example, you sit awkwardly as everyone sings you happy birthday. What are you meant to be doing? Looking at the cake? Looking at everyone around you? I never know what to do. Plus the endless stream of birthday wishes from people you haven't spoken to since your previous birthday, as if they only remember your existence on that particular day. Then you have to be polite and thank them, then you're stuck having a small talk conversation with them on everything that's been going on in your life since your last birthday. It's just a lot of emotional energy that I don't feel like spending. Which is why I don't tell anyone when my birthday is, I try to let it go on like any other day, unnoticed. Not to make a fuss of it...

"Happy Birthday!" I heard my roommates shout, as they all piled onto my bed. I sat up slowly and dazed before cracking open my eyes. Before me, Jade held a cupcake with a lit candle. The best thing about my friends is that despite them knowing I hate my birthday, they always try to do something to make me feel special on the day. Hoping to one day convert me to a birthday lover.

"It's Red Velvet, your favorite." Jade informed me, smiling.

"Make a wish." Dee added happily. I simply closed my eyes and blew out the candle. I don't particularly know what I wanted to wish for today and so I saved my wish for later. I don't think it works like that, but I'm if the universe is forcing me to celebrate my birthday it should also allow me to save my wish, right? As long as I make the wish before the end of the day.

"Thank you guys, I really appreciate it." I smiled up at them before placing the cupcake on my side table. I quickly went into the bathroom to brush my teeth and do my skincare routine before rejoining the group. "Just as a reminder, if you tell anyone what today is, I will kill you." I added sweetly before looking at my closet thinking about what I wanted to wear today. Luckily we only have to wear these dresses until we get released for spring break which won't be much longer.

"What? Why?" Bri asked, coming up next to me as I picked out a light pink dress. I stepped into the dress motioning for her to come help me put it on.

"I've always disliked my birthday. I'm just not a fan of making a big fuss about it. I'd just like to have this day pass along quietly as if it's just another regular day. Please and thank you." I choked out as Bri tightened my corset.

"But-..." Bri began to argue before Jade stepped in.

"We've been having this argument with her for years. She's just not a birthday person. So we just get her a little cupcake and privately give her gifts and move on." Jade patted Bri on the shoulder as she passed into the bathroom.

"And I appreciate it very much. You guys are so, so sweet to me. I always feel very loved on my birthday because of y'all." I smiled at them and they rolled their eyes.

"But Ela, this is the day the whole world got blessed with you. I'm at least grateful you're in my life. That's something that should be celebrated!" Bri argued, quite sweetly might I add.

"I appreciate that. I'm just not a birthday person. Never have been, never will be." I shrugged as I put my hair up in a bun. I couldn't be bothered to do anything elaborate. "But catch me around the holidays and I'm a completely different person. I love christmas!" I felt my phone vibrate in my boobs. I pulled it out and answered it. "Hello?"