Chapter 6
I am sitting outside our house with James, watching at our little brother play around with his friends. It's nice to see George happy, like he doesn't have any father issues. And I'm grateful for that, as much as possible, I don't want to see George sad. He's the light of this house now. The reason why James and I are so determined to work is him. My brother and I have faced so many adversities in life that we do not want George to face in the future. We want him to have a good future, the one we knew that could never happen to us anymore.
Suddenly, James elbows me and keeps on asking me about Terence. I've never seen my brother so eager about any topic except for my 'secret' love issue with my best friend. "Have you told Terence yet?" he asks.
I shake my head. "I can't", I say. I don't want to ruin whatever it is with us. "And even if I can, I won't." I say again. Just as before James can speak again, I hear Terence's voice from faraway. I look to my side and find him walking in our street with his two hands in his pockets. He gives us the smile that makes my heart skip. 'I don't want to see you hurt again' it echoes in my mind as he approaches us. My eyes are set on the ground as if there's a treasure down the soil. I feel my brother's elbow against mine. I give him a deadly look and finds that Terence is staring at me.
George who's been playing race with Amy and the others come to my side and says hi to his best playmate – Terence. "Hey, Terence!" says George and then grins at me. My two brothers are in two opposite side on this one. James doesn't like Terence and hates the fact that I'm in love with him, while George adores Terence a lot. Terence is his idol. Actually, George always tells me that he wants to be just like Terence when he grows up. They both raise their thick eyebrows at me, suggesting two different opinions. One's 'don't tell him' and the other one is 'go ahead'. It is like a battle of a devil and angel.
I roll my eyes at them and shouts "Give me a break!" I slap my hands on my lap and stand up. All eyes are on me now, like I said something terrible. I look at Terence and drag him out of our place.
"Hold up, there" He says, pausing for a minute. "What's the matter?" He asks curiously. George is right, so does my heart. I have to tell him. This is it. I sigh deeply but instead of confessing, something out of the blue comes out of my mouth. "I am stressed out. Whitehorn Academy haven't given me any letter yet. I hate waiting as much as you do, it's eating me alive!"
He bends a little so our eyes are in the same level and leans closer, I can feel his warm breath touching my face. "I'll just pretend I believe you." Then he stretches his nude lips making an irresistible smile and taps me in the shoulder. He knows me better than anyone, sometimes he knows me more than I do. He knows when I am lying or keeping a secret – the only thing he doesn't know yet is my feelings for him, he's too numb to figure it out. "Come on" says Terence. He pulls me by my wrist and leaps for two steps and then pause. He narrows his looks at me, head to foot, like he's examining my physical appearance or something.
"What?" I ask.
"Have you been eating lately? You're thinner than before." He shakes his head and shifts his hold from my wrist to my hand. My eyes widen and stare for a second at our hands that clasps together. My heart skips a beat when his hand holds mine. His hand brushes into my palm, filling the spaces of my fingers. His hand is rough like sand paper and as strong as hammer. I feel the warmth of his hand, like a freshly brewed cup of tea, engulfing not just my hand but my whole body. I haven't given any malicious reactions or awkward fantasies about our holding hands before; we always do that. I was used to it. But I guess talking about my feelings for him with my two brothers made me fall for him even more.
