You Can't Choose Your Family ➸ Demi Lovato

{Chapter 40}

Trigger warning

Demi calmed me down, preventing a panic attack caused by the realisation of my actions.

"It's okay baby girl. It's in the past and we're going to move on from it." My sister had climbed onto my hospital bed and was holding me close, rubbing my back and talking into my ear reassuringly.

"I'm so sorry," I whispered feebly, my voice still hoarse from being unused over a prolonged period. "I didn't mean to, I swear."

I leant back into Demi's shoulder in shame as she continued telling me that it was okay.  It wasn't though, was it? Trying to commit suicide wasn't okay. Even if it wasn't my immediate intention, I still did it. It still happened. I tried to fucking kill myself. How screwed up is that?!

After a unknown duration of time, it could've been minutes or hours as my mind wasn't focused on it passing, someone entered the room. It was Wilmer.

"You're awake hermosa," he stated, smiling kindly at me but staying by the room's door. Is he scared of me and doesn't want to come closer? "Babe have you told a nurse?" He directed the question at Demi.

"Oh shit no! Was I supposed to?" Demi asked, grimacing and raising her eyebrows whilst squinting one eye. You know, the general 'shit-sorry-I-didn't-realise-face'.

"Don't worry I'll do it now. Be back in a moment."

Wilmer left again only to arrive a few minutes later with a nurse. I checked the female out sceptically, she was young - probably late twenties, with blonde hair tied into a pony tail which reached in between her shoulders. She wasn't smiling but her face looked uplifted and kind.

"Hi Saskia, I'm Nurse Weston and I'm just going to check your vitals seeing as you just woke up." She said in a calm voice. I think I judged her right, she seems pretty nice. I nodded in response. "Sorry Miss Lovato but would you mind moving whilst I do the procedures? You can go back in there with Saskia afterwards."

Demi reluctantly crawled out of our embrace and plopped off the side of the bed. She sat in the chair she had previously occupied and took my hand in hers, rubbing the back of it with her thumb. Wilmer wrapped his arms around her from behind and kissed her temple. I smiled, glad my sister had found a genuine guy not some selfish asshole like Joel. I frowned at the thought of that goddamned shitface.

"Are you okay if I start?" Nurse Weston asked, looking concerned at my facial expressions.

I shook my head, trying physically to rid my thoughts of Joel and pulled a small smile onto my features. "Yeh sure."

The nurse took my blood pressure, body temperature, pulse rate and heart rate. I lay there obligingly as she worked. The reason behind my good natured behaviour being that as soon as this was over and they'd gotten the message that I was okay now, the sooner they'd let me home. I've always disliked hospitals, not for any particular reason except the fact that there's never really a happy reason you have to visit one.

"Okay, all done." Nurse Weston concluded, "you're looking fit and well although your blood pressure is still low." She gave me a sympathetic smile, "which is fine whilst you're lying down but as soon as you get up and around it could start to cause problems like fainting, nausea and blurred vision. We'll check it again in a few hours and see if it's gotten back to normal and if it's all good then you'll be fit to go home then. Press the red button above your head in an emergency." She finished as she made her way to and out the door.

I let out a long moan in frustration. "Why can't I go home now?" I scowled at Demi and Wilmer.

"Because not everything's back to normal yet, you heard her." Demi said, pouting slightly showing her own annoyance at the prolonged stay in hospital.

"Sucks." I muttered. Both adults nodded in agreement. There was a moment of quiet before questions that had been nagging me at the back of my brain for a while surfaced. "What time is it?"

Demi checked her phone, "2.34pm on 29th December."

"Shit so I was out for a while?" I furrowed my eyebrows in disgust of my actions. Demi shook her head in the positive. "What actually happened? Like after I got unconscious?" I asked timidly, not really wanting to know the answer but intrigued all the same. It would bother me intensely if I didn't know.

Demi took a deep breath before starting, "I was in my room being a moody bitch and I was angry and scared at what Joel had done." She said in a self depreciating manner. Wait, Demi didn't blame herself did she? My worries were cut off by her continuing, "then Wilmer came up asking if I was okay because he'd heard a thump from through the ceiling. He thought something had fallen over and broken-" Demi was already struggling to continue. A few tears were gently sliding down her face.

Wilmer quickly caught onto this, starting to massage her shoulders soothingly and took over retelling the events of last night.

"So I went to check on Demi and she was okay, so then I went to check on you too. I opened the door and found you unconscious. I called an ambulance and yeh..." Wilmer trailed off, finishing up his very brief account. "And now we're here."

I laid back further into my bed, thinking about the occurrences of last night both from Wilmer and Demi's point of views and my own.

All I can conclude is: I regret it and I wish I could take those moments back.

***
I'm back at school (*cries*) so updates will become a little less frequent but I promise I will try and get at least one, I'll aim for an update per week.
love you all thank you so so much for taking the time to read ❣